A squirrel and an owl are sitting in a tree. The squirrel turns to the owl and says nothing, because it is a squirrel and squirrels can't talk. The owl turns to the squirrel and eats it, because it is a bird of prey.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have 5 fingers. The middle one is for you.

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What do you call 25 college teens at a party? A good time.

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Why couldn't Timmy ride a bicycle? Because Timmy was a goldfish

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A guy orders soup at the resturant and says to the waiter, "will you try this soup?" The waiter says "what is it too hot?" the guy says "just try the soup." the waiter asks "Is it too cold?" the guy sais just try the soup." the waiter says "fine, where's the spoon?" AHAHHH!!!

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Q:how do you make a rockstar cry? A: hit him with a breifcase

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A father teaches his son to ride a bike. Father: Don't stop or you'll fall. Son: Ok, dad. They have a nice time,

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Why did the black guy not tip his pizza driver? Because he didn't order pizza.

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Romans rights.

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Pull my finger ouch..

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What's red ad looks like a green bucket? A red bucket to a color blind person

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I walked up to my friend who's a drug addict holding a can of coke. I then told said friend that I liked the smell of coke. My friend then went on to snort 27 Kilos of cocaine.

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Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

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why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a date-rapist

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Where did Mary go when the bomb blew up? Everywhere.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To try and get hit by a car.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders house? yea, neither has he.

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Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. Where's my tractor?

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How come Dorothy couldn't feel her legs? The metal cable snapped.

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Q: What do you call a Muslim controlling a plane? A: A pilot.

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What's worse than stepping on legos? Massive genocide

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How do you get a one armed man out of a tree? you throw a fridge at him

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wanna here a dirty joke? Suree A white horse fell in a mud puddle dum dumdum dum duuuuuuummmm

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Girl : What's a anti joke ? Boy : it's you .

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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