I watched The Pianist last night? Holocaust

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Q: How do you stop a rhino from charging? A: Shoot it.

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What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing really, it just let out a little whine.

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why did the boy fall off his bike? someone threw a fridge at him

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Why did the kid eat his homework because the teacher said it was a piece of cake

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What did one volcano say to the other? Hey.... wana get some lunch... later, not now of course it's WAAAAY TOO EARLY!

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What starts with an N and ends with R, that you wouldn't want to call a black person? Neighbor

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A penis takes a trip to spain, he falls in love with an apple and proceeds to commit suicide

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Yo mama so fat She could die any day.

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Three dogs start a club called the Holly Place Exclusive Dog Club. The Club Motto is, "You can't be in our club. Just us. Read the sign. It says "Exclusive". How is that confusing? Get away from here. Now."

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What's not funny? Today's anti-joke writers

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How does camon Die? He kills himself because he didnt make it into the marine corps

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why did the little girl eat grapes? because she felt like it.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks him, "Why the long face?" The horse did not reply, because horses cannot talk.

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what did the dog say to the mailman? woof.

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A Muslim walked into a bar....nothing happened

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How do you make time fly? Develop a flying suit to put on a sun dial.

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What's worse than a dead baby in a barrel? A dead baby in 8 barrels.

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Whats green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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What's worse then one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse then two bee stings? The Holocaust . What worse then the Holocaust? Three bee stings.

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Hi i want a cheeseburger and a small fry, said bob. And then, said the guy taking the order. thats all, said bob. And then, said the guy. Ummmm ok well i take small coke, said bob. And then, said that guy. Thats all, said bob. and then, said the guy. whatever i'll take a milkshake, said bob. And then, said that guy. and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then

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kknocckkck knockckkckccck hue's theeeair? TTThhe pOOOliCCee. fffor whaaa? yyouu rr arreesstedd forrr drrunkkkc dddrivvinnng! Puuut urerre frreaakkki'n hannnddss uppp!

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A duck walks into a bar. Animal control is notified, and the duck is released into a nearby park.

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A Rock accidentally fed a giraffe his fetuses conceived by a box of glue from Jewish Heritage that was made from marker sharpeners that fed paper to elephants while strumming a box of tissues to wipe up the mess from a box of chocolates Forest Gump feeds on your soul while a rock accidentally feeds a giraffe.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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