Knock Knock. Who's there? Charles. Charles who? It's your brother Charles. I came straight here from the doctor. I was just diagnosed with stage 4 testicular cancer.

Why did the clown's ballon animal pop? He was a victim in a drive by shooting.

why did the man paint his house? cause he never wanted to mow the lawn

What do you call it when an old person cuts off their fingers? Dementia

Women's Rights

knock knock who's there? me josh! come in.

What do you call a penguin sliding down a hill how should i know.

What does a duck have in common? The further it flies the more.

your mama so old, shes dead.

Whats the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies? You can't unload one with a pitchfork

Why did the baby stop crying? I hit him with a brick.

If you don't see banners here, it doesn't mean they are not there...

How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

So a penguin walks into a bar. Penguin's have been affected by global warming so much that they decide to drink away as they near their final hours.

Why doesn't Michael Jackson sleep with boys anymore? -Because he is dead.

Q:Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, an honest lawyer and an old drunk are walking down the street together when they simultaneously spot a hundred dollar bill. Who gets it? A:The old drunk, of course; the other three are mythological creatures.

Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

What do you call a black man driving a plane? A pilot, you racist.

What do you call 50 jewish, homeless men peeing into a river? Pollution.

What's the difference between dead babies and the holocaust? A lot.

Why did the sheriff cross the road? Cuz I told him to.

Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the squirrel.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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