hello

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What did the white man say to the black bartender? I'll have a pint please.

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What is the oppisite of water? Dry!

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What's big and messy? A big mess

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An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

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Why did the college student post unfunny anti-jokes on anti-joke.com? Because he was bored shitless.

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Q: Why did Sarah fall off the swings? A: She had no arms Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sarah.

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Der Ter-Rerks, nern ter serrentersts ers "Terernerserers Rerks", wers er dernerser dert lerved ern der Certersers perrerd. Ert wers er mert erter, prering ern smerler, plernt-erterng dernersers serch ers herdrersers ernd serrerperds. Ert erser hernterd der herned herberver Tersererterps, werd erverderns erf ferts ferned ern der ferserlersed rermerns.

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I had an amnesia joke But it was written down on a slip of paper because someone else wrote it down. Let me just take it out & read it to you

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Why did the black man cross the road? he just wanted to cross the road, racist. ... after he had robbed a bank

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A man died and went to heaven. Luckily, he was resuscitated by a trained medical professional, and after a stern warning from his doctor, he lost weight, limited the cholesterol in his diet, and went on to live a very happy and healthy life.

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Do you know why this joke isn't funny. It's punchline is bad.

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a man was shot.... he died

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What is the difference between 1 and 2? 2 is a higher number than 1.

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so a man walks into a bar...... He has a couple laughs over some drinks then went home.

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What's white and horny? A unicorn

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So my friend told me to go shot myself I got my Canon and shoot myself The image came out very clean and profession.

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Wanna hear something irrational? Pi

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Why did the depressed man commit suicide? Its typical of a depressed person.

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" Want to hear a good anti-joke?! " " Sure! " " Me too. "

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Why did John get hard? He froze to death

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Your momma's so old, she your family should be proud to know someone who has lived such a long and full life.

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What do George Washington, JFK and Hillary Clinton have in common? They've never been to my house.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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