Why was Johnny sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

Knock Knock. Who's there? The Police. She told me she was nineteen.

Why did the blonde arrest the man? Because he brutally murdered his wife and children.

Q: What does a really poor kid say to his friends? A: I hate over working for 75 cents an hour...

I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

Wanna hear a joke? Womens rights ;) Wanna hear another joke? Too bad i'm not gonna tell you

Yo mama got so bad teeth her dentist said she should get them surgicly removed and get lifelike dentures

Why did Hitler Commit suicide? Because he was completely depressed and overwhelmed by the fact he had lost World War II.

How do you make a Dead Baby Float..... ......With 3 scoops of ice cream and 1 cup of liquid stem cells.

Why did the teacher's cat die? It had cat herpes and feline immunodeficiency virus

My wife's star sign was Cancer and its quite ironic how she died really... She was attacked by a giant crab.

Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint.

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What's worse than depression? Having depression and killing yourself

What did chris say? Nothing, bushes cant talk!

There's this traveling merchant from Flint, MI. He goes door to door trying to sell shampoo. He is having a lot of trouble selling shampoo in Flint because they were hit hard during the recession and now ahve trouble affording even the most seemingly cheap products.

A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease

What do you call two gay guys? People who should be living in California.

What did one sexy babe say to the other? We are sexy

It's likely that very few people will read this.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the only way to get across

A man walked up to a fork in the road. He bent down, picked it up, and continued on his journey.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because it felt like it, now mind your own business!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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