Person 1: want to hear a joke? person 2: yes.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Penis.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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What do you call a black man on the moon?? Never going to happen

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why did the baby die? It was hit by a bus and then raped by a seal.

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You know its time to leave when she wake's up out of her coma and your balls are on her chin.

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How many pupils does the teacher have? 2.

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What is yellow, has wheels, and lies on its back? A school bus in a terrible accident.

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Q: What do you call a stop sign in the winter? A: A stop sign in the winter.

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Knock Knock Who's There Fat white lady with dreadlocks Fat white lady with dreadlocks who? want to buy some girls scout cookies?

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What did hitler say to the jews? Die.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Impossible, fruits to not have the ability to talk.

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Why did the buetiful woman marry the homeless man? True love

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Uh... No? Listen, the other 2 people that bother using this "site" (excuse for one) would not give a damn, and if some world government are after us they wont find shit. What? If I said no you would hack this site? My mother can hack this site, thats what makes it so useful for us... SO PLEASE DO NOT TELL EEEEEEEEEVERYONE THAT MY MORALS AND SHIT ARE ALL CODES THAT NOBODY HAS THE BRAIN TO DECODE PLEASE <<<<<<<<< *Sarcasm detector goes off* Seriously though, nah, dont hack nor delete anything, I kinda like how I got some thumbs ups on the comment section where I shared about my mother finally dying and me feeling the world against me great etc blahblah, "Erica" and "Wizard" thumbed those up and are now with us (seriously Wizard? Geek somebody?)

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why is walmart so big? Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory that a typical person should or could ever possibly need all in one place.

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My dog has no dictionary. How does he spell terrible?

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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Q:What happened when the bear walked into the bar? You cannot answer because you were seriously injured by the bear.

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How long does it take for a black woman to have a shit. 9 months.

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A guy wearing a top hat walks into a bar. He says, "Ow."

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Why do women wear makeup and perfume? Because they're ugly and they smell bad.

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Hitler walks in to pizza pizza, the manager asks how many? L

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Why couldnt rex bark??? because he was a fish!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops