Whats 9 plus 10? 19

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How do you make a firefighter happy? Give him a blowjob and 10 million dollars.

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What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Nothing. She isn't supposed to chat because it's study hall and they enforce a strict "no talking" policy.

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Why did the baby die? Lack of oxygenated blood to the brain.

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What did the girl say before she jumped a bridge? "Do you think I can jump off this bridge?"

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Interviewer: Are you currently a smoker? Applicant: Are you implying that I look like a chimney?

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Bird is the Word. Actually 'What" is the word.

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In Soviet Russia... ...there are many buildings and landmarks for the viewing.

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The teacher asked: If you have two apples, and I give you two, how many do you have now? FOUR said the student.

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What's 9+10? 19

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whats white and sticky? a white stick

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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how did the homeless man die? He got stabbed

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A: Knock knock. B: Come in. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ?cash(p)

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Why didn't Susie do her reading homework? She is blind and her school system cannot Afford to teach her to read braille

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A frog walks up to Steve, and says "Hey, Steve." Steve is terrified because a frog knows his name, and is walking.

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Why do cows say moo? Because it's a cow

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A man walks into a bar at 4:00 PM NO it was actually 4:01 because my clock is messed up and My dad likes cheese plus pie

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What has 2 legs, a heart and a conscience? YER MA

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"I'm gonna fight fire with fire!" "won't you just get more fire?" "True..."

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What does it take to make the best anti-joke ever? not this

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Hey i just met you and this is crazy but your adopted banana

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What's the difference between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my d i c k in your a s s.

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What would George Washington do if he was able to talk to all of America? Ask them to dig him up.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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