Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because the crossing gaurd allowed him to

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An man was tested positive for HIV. He then called his girlfriend and told her she should get tested.

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Who does creatine? James Cornish

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Why did the kid lose his mom? She was shot.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? about 900 pounds

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If your yacht is if moving at 50 knots per hour in a wind tunnel how many leprechauns can you fit in a chamber? Even, because purple is attracted to bestiality.

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Communism hehe xd

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How do you scare off a ghost? Tell him your ready for a commitment.

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roses are red, violets are fine, you be the six, and I'll be the nine.

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It's probably not a good idea that your in here, any sudden movements and you could seriously injure somebody. Our beer glasses aren't ergonomically designed for your kind of species. I'm going to have to ask you to leave

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I like that, but why am I happy?

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how do you wake up a cat? you break it.

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Roses are red, and blood is too. But violets are purple. NOT FUCKING BLUE.

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The Pope walks into a bar, the barman says: "What'll it be, Pope?" But the Pope's knowledge of English is tenuous at best. He mumbles something in Latin that the barman doesn't understand. The Pope becomes frustrated and leaves.

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Q: whats funnier than watching a black man and a midget fight? A: anything technically, your opinion

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew. The pizza doesn't scream in the fire

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Where did the kid go when the bomb exploded? Everywhere

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Two lifelong friends walk into the locl Bar and each order a Beer. " So how's life treating ya?" Phil replies, " Well Doug, I've got Stage Four Lung Cancer. I'm going to Die, remember?" Unfortunately, Doug doesn't remember because Doug has a Brain Tumor.

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Do you know why, when geese fly south for the winter, one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

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A black man texts his wife to tell her that he is going to be late coming home from work.....Just kidding, pay phones cannot send text messages.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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I fear I do, maybe someone fooled you, but that was originally one of my aliases.

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Oh NOES! She does worry about me! YOU MUST APOLOGIZE! Relax, the body has two sources of happy drugs, one is the sweet calm stuff I am really bad at, and the other comes with adrenaline and stuff, the name of which I do not remember, both are important, but yeah, I am a thrill seeker, and when I do not find them, I make a thrill out of whatever I got, whatever that means.

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A baby walks into a bar and the bartender says.... Where is your mom?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops