- Anti Joke

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a serial killer.

Why were my arms so tired after I flew in from the coast? Because the stewardess, god rest her soul, failed to latch the door securely.

Your mum is such a slut, I'd reccomend she seeks psychiatric help, as her deviant promiscuity is clearly a phsical manifestation of some deep rooted psychological disfunction. We all wish her well.

hey i just met you and this is crazy but here is my gun so get in the van

The boy said to the priest, may God be with you. The priest responded with, "And also IN you".

Why was the little boy sad? Both of his parents died in a tragic car accident.

That awkward moment when you get in the van and there's no candy.

The next person to submit a 'roses are red' 'joke', is cursed to always prematurely ejaculate from here until eternity

Knock knock, COME IN!

What does a weasel and a naked college girl have in common? No clothes

WELCOME TO THE GARLIC BOYS SHOW! So kids, what are we gonna eat today? POTATOES! FUUUUUUU! Moral: You say tomata, I say WROOOOOOOONG, you say cheap I say your mother.

Why was the Magic: The Gathering player a virgin? Because he was underage and it would have been immoral for him to have had sex.

What's the difference between a pelican? 28, because elephants have 4 legs.

What do you call a german soldier? A Nazi

Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

knock knock? come in

What's eighteen inches long, stiff, and makes women scream at night? A twelve inch long penis that is erect, thus adding approximately one half of its flaccid size, and involved in the act of fornication with the female partner of the man whose penis I am describing. (Of course, it is ignorant and juvenile to assume that the man in question is heterosexual. He may be a homosexual, which is perfectly acceptable in these liberal times we live in, or he may in fact be single and not inclined towards a sexual preference of any kind. This is understandable due to the myriad complications of long-term relationships, a result of the infinite differences between the masculine and feminine psyches.)

What is sad and disappointing? Nevada's and California's snow pack.

What happened to the Asian who ran into the wall with a boner? He ejaculated his sperm, impregnating the wall. The wall went to the authorities, and the man was charged with rape. He is now serving a 10 year prison sentence, with no possibility of parole.

An English couple walk int a Portuguese bar. They never see their daughter again.

how do you make a plumber cry? you kill his family!

What did Timmothy get when he got back from his vacation in a tropical destination? Malaria.

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My friend asks me what my mom does for a living and i told him that she is a nurse. Then he says "That a good job because she is able to save lives". I quickly reply "She works in an abortion clinic".

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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