Why do thieves shower before undertaking a robbery? Probably part of their morning routine.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse then says nothing because horses cannot talk, only humans can talk.

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A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

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Your mom is so ugly- Wait, hold on. How are you born?

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What's worse than a worm in your apple That one time I rapped and killed your mom, oh and happy birthday prick

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It had a heart attack. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i thought violets were violet. hmph.

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Q:Whats worse then hard nipples A:The holocaust

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Why does the Easter Bunny hide his eggs? So nobody finds he's been fucking hens.

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So Colton Yepma walks in to Accounting and proceeds to read jokes

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The secret to McDonalds success is all their customers are to fat to leave

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what did the grandma do after she was pushing up daisies? washed her hands because gardening is a dirty activity

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What's worse than finding half a suicide tablet in your apple? Finding half a worm.

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What do you call Jack Black on a bad day? Kevin Hart.

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What does a banana and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them are a police officer.

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A teacher, a lawyer, and a doctor are all at the edge of the cliff. Then they jump off and die.

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The last person on Earth is sitting home alone when suddenly there is a knock at the door. Knock knock Who's there? *silence* Damn this joke got creepy...

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Why did the plane crash? Because a loaf of bread was the pilot.

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When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

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What is worse than finding dead parents? Not finding them.

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Why did the black man vote for Obama in the presidential election? Every person over the age of 21 has an open opinion to vote for the person of their choice to run as president for a 4-year term.

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2 black guys, a colombian guy and a white girl are sitting at a bar. They are friends.

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to change the bulb, one to suck my dick!

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What do you call a gay kid, a horrible singer, and has long hair for a guy? Justin Bieber

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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