Thanks, I admire your sincerity, and I am happy to see that I got a lot more in common with you, than with well, my nerdy and geeky friends, which are not reading this here and now unless they are going against their orders and messing up their own work schedule. I just want you to know that I have fallen in love with you Nero, and if that is a problem for you, please let me know ASAP.

what did the astronomer say when he lost his telescope? where is my telescope?

Knock Knock! Who's there? Dog Dog wh- wait how did you knock? *mindblown*

Superman and Batman get in a fight, who wins? No one the world has just lost a superhero.

Q: What are the best kind of jokes? A: The funny ones.

What did the white man say to the black man at midnight? It's really dark out.

Why was the chicken sad Thanksgiving

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like funny jokes but I tend to ruin the punchline by just talking too much and that's probably why no one likes me and...

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot. You racist.

Mother Theresa, Billy Graham, and Joseph Smith walk into a bar. Just kidding, no they didn't.

What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what you named it.

Have you heats about the Guy who's parents died in à car crash... No He killen himself because of hus parents Deathstars

give me a gun or i will shoot you i dont know what with but i will kill you so run run or i will come and get you

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and says nothing to the man running the stand. Realizing that the duck might potentially keep patrons from approaching the stand, he packs up and moves elsewhere.

why are some people black? Because god decided there needs to be different people in the world therefore none are congruent

Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait I shouldn't tell you, it's too long

A man walks into a bar and takes a seat at the bar stool. He then proceeds to look over and said a man in a suit and tie open up the window , jumps, and begins to float in mid air. In amazement he approaches the man. He says " That's amazing! How do you do that?" The man in the suit and tie replies "Drink this liquid and you will be able to fly." The man with excitement quickly rushes to the window, opens it, and suddenly falls to his death. The bartender says to the man with the suit and tie " Superman, you're a real dick when your drunk."

Roses are red, Violets are blue, We have STD's, Now so do you!

Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. They all broke beyond repair.

there's a new drink out called the Bin Laden... it consists of two shots and a splash of water

A grandfather clock fucked my bicycle!

Denard Robinson

What has four legs and is always ready to travel? Siamese twin fugitives.

Der Ter-Rerks, nern ter serrentersts ers "Terernerserers Rerks", wers er dernerser dert lerved ern der Certersers perrerd. Ert wers er mert erter, prering ern smerler, plernt-erterng dernersers serch ers herdrersers ernd serrerperds. Ert erser hernterd der herned herberver Tersererterps, werd erverderns erf ferts ferned ern der ferserlersed rermerns.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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