Why don't women have breasts? Because they have dandruff. Get it? Hint: "dandruff" = "dan druff"

If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

Q. What did the Muffins say to the man? A. Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects therefore unable to speak.

Nancy Kerrigan walks into a club

Why did the black guy lose the race? He toke an arrow to the knee

yo mama soooooooooooo fat that she should be concerned of the incressed risk of dibties

Why did the little girl fall off of the swings? She had no arms... Why couldn't she get up? She had no legs... Why didn't anyone help her up? She had no friends... Why did she die? She landed in a puddle...

Hey i just met you, and this is crazy, i have amnesia, i'm Skepta

knock knock, who's there me me who he opens the door a kills yo

Q: What do you call a dog driving a car? A: A dog driving a car.

There was this girl who suffered for her whole life and then she died. It was very liberating.

Did you know him? Why the anonymous tip?

What's funny about a black person, a Jew, and a mexican's graves being side by side? Nothing.

what's worse, ten babies stapled to a tree or one baby stapled to ten trees?

What is the opposite of a joke ? Racism

Why is the interesting goat so talented at chess? He's Bobby Fischer's dad.

What is worse then losing your remote? Falling off a cliff landing on a sharp rock and dying slowly.

What's the difference between a panda and a baby? I don't have a baby in my freezer

a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because the p is silent!

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

If you have $5 and Chuck Norris has $5, Chuck Norris now has $10.

1,000 americans jump off a plane. They all die as a result of not having parachutes.

What did the physicist say when he got his penis stuck in a test tube? Ah jeesh! I got my penis stuck in a test tube.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...