A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

knock knock "whos there ?" "the police , your husband has died" "ok"

I FEEL LIKE I'M RIDING ON A CLOUD actually it's physically impossible to ride on clouds because they are sparsely situated ice particles.

What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

Two cows were in a feild, one said "moo" and the other said "i was going to say that!"

Why did the Pakistani man cry when the Nigerian man was killed in a terrorist attack? They were lovers.

What has three legs, one eye, and is green and fuzzy. I don't know. Me either.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Oh..wait...that's actually an anti-joke already...

Person 1: I'm really sleepy. Person 2: Then go to sleep.

Yo momma so stupid she threw a rock at the ground And missed.

There were two mufins in an oven. They did not say anything because muffins are incapable of speech.

KANE TUCKER HAS A CHODE THE SIZE OF HIS FINGER NAIL

Your mum is such a slut, I'd reccomend she seeks psychiatric help, as her deviant promiscuity is clearly a phsical manifestation of some deep rooted psychological disfunction. We all wish her well.

Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad at making jokes And your a jew

race-car = rac-ecar

what is worse than a hole in your sock? Getting raped

Q: What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a sheep? A: A genetic aberration that is an insult to both God and man.

Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

Why can't a T-rex clap its hands? It's extinct.

What did the black kid get for Christmas? An X-box, a sweater and some socks.

Hey I just met you And this is crazy But I have alzheimer's Hey I just met you Coopn8r

What did Robin say to Batman before they entered the Batmobile? "Batman, I'm a necropheliac."

Q: what sport has a bunch of white guys sitting on a bench? A:the NBA

Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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