What did the Atlantic Ocean say to the Pacific Ocean? Sploosh

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Q: Why are pine trees green? A: Because of the green pigments in the leaves known as chlorophyll which are used to capture sunlight.

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Theres a girl you like, and a you are playing football with friends. You see the girl about to get hit by the ball, but you catch it. She says "Your a life-saver" and hugs you "You scream touchdown!!!" to impress her, you spike the ball on the ground and it hits her in the face.

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Evan Ramsey hahaha go CAD

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Once upon a time a guy took his pants off why because he was touching himself

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A guy dared his friend to jump off a bridge for 10 bucks. His friend, fearing for his life did not jump.

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roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

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Why was the boy put on his socks? So he wouldn't get blisters.

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Whats worse than getting broken into by a robber? Looking at Obama

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A jew is a human being who will understand and laugh at a joke, while a pizza will just sit there because it is only a delicious thing that people eat.

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A black and a white man walk into a grocery store the black man buys fried chicken and the white man buys vegtables. The men both have different opions and enjoy different food groups.

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I read a haiku. It was honestly quite good. That's basically it.

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I'm a vegan thats why I am still a Virgin.

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Why didn't the man get into Harvard? Because he had bad grades

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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It takes a minute to know somebody, an hour to fall in love, but a lifetime to forget. Once, my mom forgot me at Disney World.

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Roses are gray, violets are blue; I'm red-green colorblind so I occasionally have difficulty seeing most shades of red or green.

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A frog walks up to Steve, and says "Hey, Steve." Steve is terrified because a frog knows his name, and is walking.

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What state is high in the middle and round on both ends? Onorth Chiarolinao

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A redhead and a blonde both go out to smoke a cigarette. They are both at risk of lung cancer.

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What's the difference between a black person and a pizza? Pizza is a type of food.

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5 blondes walk into a bar They all leave very intoxicated and die in a car accident shortly after.

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whats worse than finding out there's mold in your bread? finding out the holocaust is in your bread

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Q. Why do cheetahs run so fast? A. Because their bodies allow them to.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops