What did the man say before he died? I am going to die.

Why did he chicken cross the road? The suicide rate in chickens has gone up 50% in the past year alone.

A plane crashes in a polish cemetery the authorities have found 2000 bodies

What does a weasel and a naked college girl have in common? No clothes

Why did the farmer cross the road? To catch the chicken

Why can't you fit 100 oranges in a bathtub? Because motorcycles don't have doors

What do you get when you cross a black man and an octopus? I don't know, but it sure would pick a lot of cotton.

Want to hear a joke? ...you're straight.

How did bill lose his legs he got them amputated after contracting a severe case of "INeedToGetMyLegsAmputatedSyndrome"

Chuck Norris farted and... several people looked around uncomfortably, not knowing how to react to the embarrassing situation.

what is black white and red all over? A black and white movie with the first violent color leave a comment if this joke is duped.

Guns don't kill people, books kill trees.

A hairy monster walks into a bar. It was halloween.

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They beat her mercilessly.

Knock Knock -Who's there? No one -Ok

Q: what did the old man do to the little boy in his dark cellar while babysitting on a stormy night? A: told him to hold a flashlight because the power went out and he needed to find his electric generator.

What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

How did the thief acquire a lamborghini? He has a side job as a lamborghini salesman.

a gay man walks into a bar the bartender says "what'll it be today" he asks for a beer the bartender comes back with a beer because thats what he asked for.

Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: Immobile.

roses are blue violets are red dont judge me

Whats red and looks like a bucket? -a red bucket Whats blue and looks like a bucket? -a red bucket disguised as a blue bucket

Why didn't the condemned man seek a reprieve of his execution? He forgot.

Why did the buetiful woman marry the homeless man? True love

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...