A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse being a horse and doesnt understand english is confused and scared by its surroundings it gallops away knocking over a few tables.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks: dude, what happened to your eye? The man replies: abuse.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's oily and smells like smegma? Kevin Crummy

thumb_up thumb_down -10

For 10 cents a day you can feed an African...they eat pennies.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

why didnt the guy go to work one morning he died in a car accident

thumb_up thumb_down -10

roses are red, violets are blue... thats what they tell me because im blind

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why was the unemployed dolphin trainer so sad? His life has no purpoise. In an unrelated topic, how is he unemployed id he is a dolphin trainer?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Dylan F is stupid He goes to his cousins house Then falls into a pit Moves on

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How many blonde chicks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to set the house on fire, and the other to call 119.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

I just wrote three jokes on antijoke.com ... nope, make that four.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's the worst part about eating a dead baby? It's a tie between the smell, the taste, and the depression associated with whatever decline in humanitsy that has brought you to this point in your life. Overall, it's an outright terrible situation.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call a white guy pointing a gun at someone? A member of the United States Army.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the man go to Jupiter? Because he was on a mission for N.A.S.A.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q: The red house is to the left and the blue house is to the right. Where is the white house? A: 3 blocks down from the red house

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the prizon cell mate get for christmas. Herpes!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The refrigerator is lying on its side and the door is ripped off. The food is all over the place and the shelves are scattered around the floor. Your house will have suffered severe structural damage that insurance plan might not cover. Also there is a mortified elephant in you kitchen.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q. How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? A. Who knows? It's dark!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

I used to have an ugly,black and disabled man as a friend. However, he had a very nasty personality so we are no longer friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's the difference between a man and a woman? Generally speaking- biology, except in cases of transexuality.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Once there was an English man, A Scottish man and an Irsh man. They were all in a scenario where each of them had to undetake a task. The English man and the Scottish man undertook their task without any problems, but the Irish man was confused resulting in a hilarious outcome.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops