Two black guys walk into a bar. The bartender says "what are you doing here" and the black guys say "to get a drink"....

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A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

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Why did the little boy fall off his bike? He was hit by a truck.

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Why are Indians so bad at football? Curry

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Why was the blind man bored? - He was in a coma

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If life throws you lemons, what do you do? Well unless life throws you water and sugar also, hen your lemonade is gonna taste horrible.

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Yo mama's so fat that they have to grease the door frame and hold a twinky on the other side to get her through.

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How do you get a bunch of Jews in a car? You tell this family who happens to be of Jewish faith that they are going to be late for the birth of another family member's child. How do you get them out? Tell the mother had a miscarriage. This will make them promptly want to leave the care and grieve with the other family members for the lost child.

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Why was Cinderella so bad at ball? Isn't that sexist, making assumptions about Cinderella's sports capability when you have never seen her play sports before (because she is a fictional character) and then asking why this is true when you have no proof that it is in fact true? But I would guess the correct answer is (if she is bad at ball in the first place) that she never played ball before. Think about it. Why did you have to ask this question at all? Isn't it obvious?

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman asks "Why the long face?" The horse takes offense and replies "I was born like this."

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I just had major Deja Vu... Cool, Brett. No one cares.

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How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

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Wow you look beautiful in that picture..... Let me see your tits. Sorry, I thought I was still texting.

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Whats the worst thing about dying? Your not alive anymore.

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An Irishman walks into a club. "Ow, that was almost as painful as that time I walked into a bar."

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1.Why were the black men asked to leave the bar? Because it was a womens bar. 2.Why did the 40 year old get an erection? Because he was excited.

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What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - I am a lawyer and you're a doctor.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot you racist! Jk a terrorist

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Why did Billy kill Joey? Joey had sex with Billy's wife... and Billy wanted revenge.

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Why can't Hellen Keller watch Spongebob? She doesn't have the proper cable service

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Knock knock Who's there? Overused punchline Overused punchline who? The Holocaust.

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knock knock... who's there... i dont know i aint got a house

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When is a Jewish persons bedtime? When the brain releases endorphins, causing drowsiness, which usually leads one to sleep.

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What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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