A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

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What's the difference between a picnic table and a Mexican? A picnic table can support a family of four.

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Why did the kid fall off his bike? His mum threw a fridge at him.

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If a canoe is stuck in a tree with its headlights on, howmany pancakes does it take to cover the roof of my house? False, snakes don't have armpits!

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All of these jokes are about white people

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How many Jews foes it take to screw in a lightbulb? 1...like... I'm confused that you... I mean screwing in a lightbulb isn't that hard.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue. Vodka is cheaper than dinner for two.

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Only people of high intelligence can laugh at anti jokes.

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what is purple and smells like poop? very weird looking poop

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Why was the Jewish holocaust bad? Because it's joke always end up on anti-jokes and millions of Jewish people where murdered in it.

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About numbers, it was 180 mg of valium... And I am going to live becausepeople got there in time, my heart never stopped because luck, the doc was only making a joke about me "having ingested enough valium to die at least twice". Sanders, I just got your girlfriend to agree to a threesome, if my banana ever wakes up again, AND WHEN... Thou areth forgiven, btw I sent him a picture of Line`s unshaved vagina, and a note stating: U recognize this? Find out more on horsehead network! Meh His name is Anders something Chattington, yeah for all that know him, guess whose finger is on her unshaven... Yeah, maybe you should not have messed with a guy that can have ANYONE. Ps: Then its your mother, then your sister which is 17 (and pretty 16 is legal here so fuck you Chatty!) and then I SHALL STRIKE THY WITH THE VENGEANCE OF A THOUSAND SUNS! Because you are forgiven, which I cant even remember what means, I mean I know I am typing my experiences here, but thats only because I remember by muscle memory where the buttons are, said the doctor... I can still play Snes emulators... Not, because my numb fingers cant click anything and Line is gone. I TOUCHED HER ALREADY YA KNO! YOU SAW THE PIC, My skin is tan, and... well you know she is here... The best part? She is totally okay with you knowing, sayonara pal, id watch the "fluor" in your mothers pussy the next time you eat it!

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Okay so there was a turtle, a pig, and a donkey. They were out fishing when suddenly they spot a man in boat. The man said he hasn't eaten in 5 days and he is very hungry. He looked at the turtle and said "no, too much shell." The turtle was happy and left. He looked at the pig and said "no, too much fat." The pig ran away and was very happy. He looked at the donkey and said "I think I'll have donkey today." The donkey ran away because he was scared. The man died from hunger.

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What has four legs in the morning, two legs at noon, and three legs at night? An experimental animal mutilated then exposed to radiation.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He did not have sufficient stability in his arm at that moment causing him to loosen his grip and drop his ice cream.

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Whats faster than a black guy with a tv? His brother who is a dentist and drives a fast sports car.

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What do you call a bird that can't fly? an ostrich

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who is there? Not Suzie

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Wat did the man say to the other man when they were alone. We dont know. They were alone.

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Why did the black guy smell fried chicken? He had a brain tumour

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If I earned a dollar for every time you've said, "I'm too old for this sh*t," I wouldn't have made very much money. You are a giraffe.

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How do you make a boy cry? Pour soup on his head.

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whats worse than being out in the cold? Being on the sun.

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You know what pansies remind me of? What? A flower

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Why did the black man go to the back of the bus? The only unoccupied seats were back there.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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