What do you call a deer that has no eyes? I have no eyedeer

What's worse than having a retarded baby? Not having a baby

what kind of dog can tiptoe

Q:What did the slut have in her mouth? A: teeth.

why do jews like money? So they can support their family.

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead dive off a motorboat. They are sucked into the propeller and brutally disfigured instantly.

Yo mamma so fat not even Dora can explore her

Justin Beiber sings. people don't listen.

Why did the chicken commit suicide? Because the numerous failed attempts of crossing over the years deemed it almost impossible, therefore, chicken could no longer see the point in life.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because, it realized that it was worth something in life, it had a meaning, a purpose, and a right to freedom, to go where it pleased. The chicken's first act of this freedom was to go across the street.

A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

Why did blonde drown? As a child a child she never learned to swim since she did not enjoy swimming.

Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are powerful machines, capable of dismemberment and death when wielded by someone who wishes to cause harm

How did the Mexican got into the USA? Trough the border.

Did you hear about that creepy guy on Facebook? He was un-friended

What is the difference between a group of magicians and a cheerleading squad? One has a cunning array of stunts.

After going at it for several minutes, the teenager, with a big grin in his face, finally busted a nut during Thanksgiving dinner and was able to remove the walnut from its shell and enjoy it.

A rhinoceros walks into a bar. As it felt threatened by the presence of many humans, the rhino attacks and kills several people with the big horn on its nose.

If the goverment wants us to be eco friendly then why are the eco friendly cars so expensive?

Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Barak Obama find a magical lamp. The Genie says, "I will give each of you one wish, and one wish only.." They all wished to be presidents.

Who didn't allow the gorilla into the ballet studio? Whoever was in charge.

How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One, usually.

How do you stop a baby from crawling in circles? Pick it up and put it in a crib, like a responsible parent.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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