Why didn't the lady answer the phone? She is deaf and mute.

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How many pancakes do you need to reach a 2.5m roof? Purple, because aliens don't fly

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby dressed as a clown.

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Roses are red They can be white too Violets are not blue They are violet

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I got bored today and decided to surf the web. Thank you for reading this

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause fuck you thats why

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Be careful not to say Betelgeuse 3 times, because if you say Betelgeuse 3 times, then Betellllwoow that was close.

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What do you get when you drink water? Piss.

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hows your wife she died 7 years ago really mine too

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What do you get when you cross a Zebra with a Sheep? Hounded by a religious group for playing God.

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If you're happy and you know it get a life

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What is the meaning of life? Bill Gates: Windows Donald Trum: Money Some poor kid:luck and rich parents.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin, your mother has AIDS.

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What do you call someone who doesn't have a soul? A ginger

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What did the sea say to the penguin? Nothing it just waved..

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I kinda said I did not want to know, sooo... Want to meet up tomorrow? Like for realsies? In that case tell me first (then show me tomorrow as proof), your cough... Vagina, I dont care if its shaven or not, but does it have red hair?

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When you try to go to anti-joke.com but get redirected to Horsehead Network...

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roses are red violets are blue holy sh*t slendermans behind you

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A black man walks into a bar. "Ouch!" He says as the Klu Klux Klan beat him with sticks

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what dyu call a bunch of white guys on a bench? the NBA

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Whats the differents between a red farrari and a dead baby? I dont have a red farrari in my garage;)

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My lady, that is the backside of trust, I have decided to trust you, how am I supposed to feel about the fact that I believe to the point where I know that you mean everything you are saying? And that if you had any interest in backstabbing me, I would be risking my life, wife and friends. Do you not get trust? If you keep thinking like that, tomorrow you could be suspecting the mailman for being a spy, I can, and could tell you that I will cut ties with my employees, but then I would have you not only to believe me, but to support me financially, I do not need much, in fact, I need you to trust me, and if you do not trust me, what does it matter if I quit? You could accuse me for typing books that alter the mind (all books do), you could accuse me of having killed Nero and taken over... The point is, if you cannot trust me, then I cannot help you with what you ask, and if that is a requirement for our friendship to persist, then you are not looking for a friend, but for a employee.

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What's Black,White and red all over? A black person with a skin disease on her period.

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Whats funnier than a barrel full of dead babies? two barrels full of dead babies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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