How do you stop a little boy from annoying you? You chop his balls of. Why was the little boy sad? Because someone chopped his balls off.

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One.

One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck. The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car. He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle. Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires. The blonde got angry and called the cops, who proceeded to come and arrest him.

What's red and can sing? Elmo

Why did the old lady talk to a tree? She had Alzheimer's and was going to die.

drugs.

how do you make a plumber sad? tell him to pull up his pants

Three guys walk into a bar: a Priest, a rapist, and a pedophile...and two other guys

why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms why did suzie get hit by a bus? she was blind knock knock whos there? not suzie.

Your mother's so fat she occupies more space than a thin person does and is more likely to bump into environmental objects.

Violence is never the answer, its the question... The answer is YES!

what did the cat say to the potato? meow

What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

Knock Knock Who's there? Your mom. Just kidding, it's the pizza guy. Pizza guy who?

What did the rugby post say to the tree? Good evening George!

What happened after Jimmy fell off the cliff? He died.

Why are the deserts so dry? Obama

Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colorblind, I hate my life

Guy 1: "Smells like UpDog in here." Guy 2: "No it doesnt.."

What's worse then the bomb that went off in boston? The second one right after.

How do you cut the sea in half? You can't. There are an odd amount of letters. You would have to jeopardize the "e", but then it would no longer be "sea".

What did Sally want for Christmas? Nothing, she is Jewish.

A guy walks into a bar. He meets a girl and they have a great time. He calls her the next day and their relationship continues for many months. Eventually they get married and have children.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? getting your ball sack ripped off with a grapple hook

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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