How do you stop a little boy from annoying you? You chop his balls of. Why was the little boy sad? Because someone chopped his balls off.

why couldn't sarah ride the bike? She had cerebral Palsy

What do a priest, a rabbi, and an asian have in common? They all don't know each other.

Whats black and blue and red all over? A housewife that was recently abused by her alcoholic wife. (from will c. and jack f.)

the other day i was walking down the street and saw a black man carrying a tv. i thought to myself, "hey that looks like mine!" but then i was like nawwwwwww, mine's at home...... shining my shoes -_-

Why was the boy laughing at Sally? Because Sally was a man

Q: What happened to the fat man on the roller coaster A: The roller coaster went slightly faster due to the laws of gravity

What`s that CREAM that comes out of you when your mom puts a WHIP on you with a switch? WHIP CREAM!

Knock Knock Who is there? Orange Orange who? Orange-Banana

Why didn't the chef serve the black guy his food? Because he wasn't a waitor.

knock knock who's there? faith

Q: what did Don Draper do after he saw an attractive woman at the ABC store? A: went home and thought about her while drinking his scotch.

What's funny about cheese? Nothing.

What is worse than banging your knee on the coffee table? Tripping over one of the legs and smacking your head on the floor, causing a severe concussion.

What do you call literature that's depressing and hard to read? ...a valued part of the English curriculum

why did the little girl scream?She was afraid of clowns and hated small cars running around a tent at 6 o'clock at night

A- Knock knock. B- Who's there? A- The interrupting doctor. B- The interrupt- A- You have cancer.

A black guy, a mexican, and an arab are all in the same car, Whos driving the car? The black guy because he politely offered and his friends were happy to ride with him.

What do you call a person who is deaf. It doesn't matter, they wont be able to hear it when you call them.

How do Mexicans like their eggs? It's a matter of personal opinion, of course.

Why'd the plane crash? Because the pilot was an orange.

Why did the woman make the man a sandwich? Because the man severed his spinal cord and is no longer able to move any of his limbs.

A man wakes up after only one hour of sleep due to his insomnia. He starts to cry because his wife just passed away and his parents were recently killed in a car accident. The man gathers his composure, takes a shower, and drives to his minimum wage job. He was expelled from high school for an assault he didnt even commit and has no money to get an education. At work, he accidentally drops a box of valuable, fragile electronic parts and gets fired by his boss. He goes home to his dirty 1 bedroom apartment and contemplates suicide. He decides to wait as his favorite tv show is on. He turns on the tv to the news his show has been cancelled. The man, depressed, suicidal and alone, picks up his .22 and kills himself. There is no God.

Life is confusing. Really how so? He just walked up to me five minutes ago with a pair of socks taped on both sides of his face saying humanity is screwed and ran off after peeing on my carpet.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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