A man walks into a bar. He hits his head and dies.

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Why was Jenny alone? Everyone else had died in a zombie apocalypse.

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what did the ox say to his son when he left for collage? bison

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What do the world and jelly beans have in common? Nothing.

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what do you call a black guy with a nice car? most probably a rapper or professional athlete, however there is also a great chance that he is a doctor of philosophy and well educated.

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Why did the man laugh? Because humans laugh when they hear a joke.

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what happened when the shoe turned into a shoe.......... nothing, it was a raisin

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meatspin.fr

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Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Everything is Red, I have a retinal hemorrhage

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Why did god make women? Because women are equally important when it comes to the birth to maintain or species.

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Why didn't the woman have a penis? Because she was female.

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How do you kill a hobo? Throw a penny off a clif.. How do you kill another hobo? Tell him the penny's still down there

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The good part of "Age" of Ultron? THANOS REIGNS! Disagree? Just leave the green thumb and fuck off!

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What part of a vegetable are you not supposed to eat? His wheelchair.

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knock knock who's there? Ah Maj. Ah Maj who? (say it outloud)

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side

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What happens when you rub two penises together? Gay sex.

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What did the kid in the wheelchair get for Christmas? AIDS.

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What do you call a half-Latino, half-Asian baby? The product of a healthy interracial couple.

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What's worse than finding a hair in lasagna? An earthworm crawling into your ear and feeding on your intestines.

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Hey how is your wife and my kids

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What does a spider Pig do? Nothing. They dont exist.

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How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

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Why were the parents sad? Because their son had a frog stapled to his face and was trying to eat his ice cream on a swing, but he had no arms so he dropped his ice cream into the street and he chased after his ice cream and got hit by a bus

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops