What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

What shall we do with the drunken sailor? Call the police to have him escorted off the boat for operating a large veichle under the influence of alcohol.

What's red, white, and black, and spins around and around? A penguin in a blender

What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I actually take my shoes off when I jump on the trampoline.

Two muffins are sitting in a oven, The other muffin says to the other muffin nothing, Because muffins are unable of human conversation.

Whats worse than the death of a celebrity? An anonymous person posting a joke on this site.

What is worse than the holocaust. A worm in MY apple!

What starts with "F" and ends with "UCK"? Fuck.

Why was the girl crying? She had just been severely raped.

A Jew was walking home one night when two thugs leapt out of the darkness and demanded his money and other possessions at gunpoint. A reflection of how dangerous our streets can be at night.

When life gives you lemons, squirt the juice in life's eyes. Then life won't trust you with lemons.

What do you do when your baby won't stop crying. Slit its throat

Who is the most famous black person? Michael Jackson, except he's not black.

What do you call a black woman that's blind and has 1 leg? Handicapped

Roses are red Violets are blue Why do the following sentences never have anything to do with the roses and violets?

Three explorers are walking through the jungle when they are suddenly captured by a group of cannibals, the cannibals, going through years of culture and hereditary custom, kill the explorers, skin their bodies, chop them to pieces and cook their flesh, finally they eat it giving them a prosperous feast while the rest of the world is unaware of whatever happened in that jungle.

What happened to the orphan? Who cares?

So an irishmen, jewish, and asain walk into the bar...and the bartender said get out..

Q.What do you call a man with no arms, no legs, no head, and no blood in his body? A.Dead.

9/11

Q: What did the black kid get for Chirstmas? A: Your bike

Knock knock Fuck off!

hey i jut met u, and i have alzeihmer, cheese and toast

If a brick said "hi" what you reply with? Nothing. You can't reply to something that doesn't speak.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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