What starts with F and ends with U-C-K? Firetruck

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A man wakes up in his bed and looks at the clock. He realises he is gonna be late for work. He quickly gets out of bed, into the bathroom, has a shower, puts his deodorant on and brushes his teeth, gets dressed, and goes in his car. He drives out of his garage and drives to his work but gets stuck in traffic. He then gets to the car park of his work and parks his car. He gets out, goes up the elevator to his floor, when the elevator door opens to his floor, he quickly says hello to Terrance and goes to his bosses office. And guess what the boss says? You're late.

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Why is the Holocaust/Worm in your apple joke the highest rated joke on Anti Jokes? Most of the viewers of this website clicked on a thumbs up symbol directly below the joke, which by the coding of this website triggered an algorithm that caused the number adjacent to this thumbs up button to increase and also caused the joke to appear higher on the list of most popular jokes.

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What do you call a white guy in a mostly black neighborhood? His name.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was involved in a homicide at the Children's Hospital resulting in death row right away and was involved in the killing of 12 other numbers on last Tuesday.

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Q: John gets attacked with a chainsaw, how many stitches does he get? A: None, Hes dead jim

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Q: What's worse than getting jury duty? A: Getting herpies from a rabbit

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WNBA

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Why did the black man get laid off? His company was no longer doing well and he was not needed.

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The next person to submit a 'roses are red' 'joke', is cursed to always prematurely ejaculate from here until eternity

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Roses are red, my name is Dave, this poem makes no sense, microwave

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A black man is trapped inside a bottle, how does he get out? He doesn't it is simply impossible for a human to get trapped inside a bottle.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your mom. Just kidding, it's the pizza guy. Pizza guy who?

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It is better to have loved and lost, Than to have fallen, bleeding, into shark-infested waters.

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how do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face

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If life gives you melons. You may be dyslexic.

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Why did the horse go to the doctor? It had a heart disease.

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So a boy walks into a bar. He broke his arm and now is severly crippled

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Your momma is so ugly that when she stepped on the mirror, it broke.

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What do you call a yelling, enraged Asian man? A fucking asshole.

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Why didn't the mexican make the basketball team? He had never practiced and was overweight

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You wanna know what's out of this world? The moon

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Why did anna stop wanting to build a snowman? Beacuse she died of cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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