What can kill you when it falls out of a tree? Anything of a considerable weight actually.

Why did Romney loose the election? Because Obama had more votes

Wanna hear a joke? no

Roses are red, Violets are glorious, Don't try to surprise Oscar Pistorius!

What's a Gigawat? I made it up.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

A man walks into a bar not a duck though

how many scrubbers does it take to change a light bulb ? 2 , 1 to change it , and 1 to make it smell piss

what did the food critic say when he was handed a snickers? I'm allergic to peanut butter

Why did the black cop pull the white guy over? He was going approximately 52 miles per hour on a 40 miles per hour speed limited road.

Roses are grey, Violets are grey, Everything's grey, I'm a dog.

Knock Knock Who's there? After no response, the man chuckled as he realized the sound of his TV mimicked that of his door knocker.

Q. How many alzhimers patients dose it take to screw in a light bulb? A. To get to the other side

Q: What did the banana say as it was being eaten? A: Nothing. Bananas are inanimate objects and therefore are incapable of talking.

You can pick you're friends, you can pick you're nose, but you can't run over a pedestrian.

a black guy a mexican guy and a puerto rican guy are driving together in a car whos driving? Whoevers car it is.

Who's obsessed with death and love to make jokes about it? The majority of the contributors in this site.

Want to hear a clean joke? Soap.

Who looks like Justin bieber, and is really cool? Justin Bieber, but I lied about him being cool.

Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent gets brutally murdered.

what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

Why'd the littler girl fall of the swing? because a drunk driver ran through the swing, the little girl was killed. he was later charged with manslaughter.

What's wheels and has green? Lied, I grassed about the wheels.

Why did the Chicken cross the roead? It didn't

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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