A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why was the girl talking to the trashcan? Her entire family was killed in a forest fire. She was the only who made it out but she had several scars and burns. For six years she had no family to talk to. She then gathered an obnoxious amount of cheaply made plastic trashcans and painted her entire family on the trashcan and proceeded to talk to it. For several years now she has been in deep conversation with the trashcan. She then attempted to ask the trashcan a series and intense question in which the trashcan did not respond to. The girl grew very frustrated with the trashcan because it did not answer her question so she angrily threw it off the side of a cliff in the middle of the woods. To answer the question above, as the trashcan was violently falling off the cliff, the girl yelled, "See you next FALL"

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Roses are grey. Violets are grey. There is an entire spectrum of the world I am not privy to.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A horse walks into a bar and the bar tender asks "Why the long face?" The horse says nothing because its a horse. It then poops on the floor and leaves

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do call the time things don't go the way you plan them? Reality. bitch

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's worse; twelve babies in one trash can or one baby in twelve trash cans?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What is better than one trillion dollars? One trillion and one dollars... duh.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the boy get his head slammed in a car door? Because his mother did not love him, and thought it was an appropiate action.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Did you hear the one about the deaf guy and the rhinoceros? Neither did he.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

what do you get when you come across a old dog with herpes, a fat man with herpes and an apple? you get nothing but the satisfaction of seeing such a horrific sight

thumb_up thumb_down +5

The song Barbra Streisand has more than 2 words.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How do you make a dead baby float? Two scoops of vanilla ice cream and two scoops of dead baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A drunk guy walks into a car

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call someone who puts one number on here as a joke? Someone with no life.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Knock, Knock. Who's there? It's me, Jeremy. Oh, great to see you! Come inside. They then have a great time watching TV and eating snacks

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what did the 3 year old get for her birthday? nothing she died of terminal cancer at the age of 2

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a clown with no sense of humor? Unemployed.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the racist white guy say to the black guy? "I don't like Asians."

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a group of Mexicans jumping over a fence? I heat of runners trying out for the Mexican Olympic hurdle team.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Quinn Grifith Randel lives in Roswell, GA

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q:Why are dinosaurs extinct? A:Well there are two reasons the first being a giant meteor struck the earth killing all the dinosaurs. The other reason you touch yourself at night.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the Goldfish say to the Black man? Nothing, because Goldfish do not have human-like vocal cords and therefore the Goldfish cannot speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why does Tim Teblow love men? Logan Cole told him to.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple in your worm.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops