Why did Susie drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

A hard-working man, in his early forties with slightly graying hair, arrives to work earlier every day. He values integrity and dedication. His loving wife is proud of his accomplishments and her favorite part of the day is when he arrives home from a day at the office. He is close friends with the Director of HR, because he believes that we all should be respected and treated fairly on the job. Today, there is a board meeting, which he prepared for extensively, because he cares deeply about what happens to this great company. His boss greets him after the meeting is done and says, "Great job, that presentation was even better than yours usually are." It was a very long meeting, so they both end up going to the Men's Room. What does he say when his boss corners him near the urinals and demands sex? Nothing. He doesn't like to talk during sex.

Why couldn't Timmy enjoy his ice cream? His lips were sewn together by an evil seamstress who was mad that he stole all of her Pop-Tarts

How do you help a one-armed man down from a tree? Wave.

Roses are red, my name is Dave, this poem makes no sense, microwave

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know I'm not a bird physcologist

Yo' Mama is so fat, her driver's license says, "picture continued on other side."

Q: why was the gay guy sad A: Becasue he was stright.

Knock, Knock Who's there? Boo Boo Who? Boo Smith

Q. How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? A. Who knows? It's dark!

WHat is funnier than a baby swimming. - A baby drowing.!

Q: what do you call a mushy green circle that tastes good? A: An avocado

Why did humpty dumpty fall off a wall? Well it turns out that he was a raging psycopath. to add on, he was also a suicidal

how hungry am i? well im as hungry a starving kid in africa!!!!

why did the chicken cross the road? there was a black man walking towards him

Why did the black man get laid off? His company was no longer doing well and he was not needed.

Where did the little boy go on vacation? His mother's funeral.

Roses are red, and many other colors too.

what did the dog say to the mailman? "hey thanks for the mail" the mailman replies "your welcome"

roses are red violets are blue I can't rhyme refrigerator

What did the black kid get for Christmas? An X-box, a sweater and some socks.

I went to the local RSPCA office today....it's tiny, you couldnt swing a cat in it.

roses are red violets are blue you smell like poo I F*****G HATE YOU!

What is a black guys favourite thing to eat? Food.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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