When life gives you lemons squeeze them at people then run away.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because 7 8 9. I'm just counting

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Adeeeellllleeeee where are my shorts

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CAOIMHIN. IVE BEEN DOING MY WORK SINCE IVE STARTED THIS CLASS. YOU'VE STARTED THIS WHOLE THING. I WROTE BIG MAC'S AND THATS IT. SO STFU

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class is canceled. My professor died.

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How do you make a sandwich out of clay? Shape it like a sandwich

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My friend thinks he's smart, He said that onions are the only food that make you cry. So I threw a coconut at his face.

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1 black guy jumped off a cliff at the same time as a white guy, who fell first? The one who weighed the most.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I hi Jacked your car And killed your family

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A man walks into a house, and the next day was taken to the hospital for a minor concussion and a possible vision deficiency.

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A black man, Jew and a Mexican go camping. A bear wanders into their campsite, but upon seeing them runs away because it's afraid of humans.

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What do you call a really old black person? Someone's grandfather

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How do you make a hormone? Modify bacteria using recombinant DNA technology.

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Why did so many describe Billy as glued to the t.v.? A terrible case of bullying and superglue resulted in the inability of Billy to remove himself from his own t.v., causing immense feelings of revenge, but his inability to move left these feelings unfulfilled.

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- Why the black people smell? - To let even the blind person hate them.

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why did the chicken cross the road? he saw a rather desperate looking homeless person coming towards him, and, realizing he had no change, figured it was the best way to avoid an awkward situation.

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So lion bites off a mans foot. He bleeds to death.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey.

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What do you call a smelly black person? An African american with poor hygiene

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Not yours.

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don't take life to seriously nobody gets out alive

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Why should we dislike all the jokes on the Newest Page? Well you should too. >.>

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Jesus. Jesus who? You're going to hell.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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