what do u call an elephant in a car? nothing elephants cant fit in cars

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so there was a frog a bear and a walrus... i forgot how the rest goes but they all die because of a nuclear holocaust

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What happens when a toad is struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else.

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What did little John do when he was bored? He went on Anti-Joke

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whats the difrence between santa clause and a jew santa goes down the chimney

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A man is going to sign up for life insurance, he is stabbed by a mugger on the way and spends his last breath in a puddle hating the cruel irony of his fate.

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Why did the guy stay up all night on the internet? because hes a fat ugly bastard with no life

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Why did god create planet earth? He isn't real.

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Michael Jackson walks into a bar. Everyone runs out, screaming, "AH, a dead guy is walking!"

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How do you know what to order at a Creole restaurant? Ask the waiter, they are usually familiar enough with the menu to make an educated recommendation.

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Knock knock... Home invasion

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prison isnt fun it also is bland kidnapping is a crime but get in the van

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Then help me understand Nero, people had the free and legal right to decide to be a part of our, or your society if you prefer, where has that option gone now? Where is the people that choose to believe in their own potential and in the one of their equals? Today we live in a society where its basically pop culture to dislike oneself, where it is considered narcissism to like oneself, and you know that we have both been affected, while those we considered allies before, have joined the same people that branded us evil.

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Should a pole bump an alarm?

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Teacher: What is 1+1? Student: 2 Teacher: Next time raise your hand before answering a question.

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Your mom is so stupid, she didn't know the answer to 2+5

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What is worse than 10 babys in 1 garbage can? 1 baby in 10 garbage cans.

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Yo mama is so stupid... She didn't graduate high school.

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Simon says why the hell are we playing Simon say!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

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Dear Anti Jokes> A black guy walks into a bar...He says hey u Idiot Gimme that Root Beer.. Tony Fast says IDIOT U GET OUTA HERE RIGHT NOW!Black women gets a gun and shoots his son... Tony Fast says im callin the cops on u then they kill alll. And they got hit by a bus. By TobyTurner

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I was very thirsty so I decided to go get some soda.Upon reaching the soda store I discovered a very long line. I decided to leave the line and instead get some milk, unfortunately once again there was a long line at the milk store. Discouraged by still thirsty I decided to try to luck at the punch store. There was a long line there also.

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A black man, an asian man, and white man walk into a bar. Not that out of the ordinary since America is a melting pot.

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What do you get when you cross a shark and a squid Nothing thats impossible

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Whats the difference between a boy scout and a jew? A boy scout gets to come home after camp.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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