What did a Blond do in the Desert? She got lost after Falling of a flying carpet

What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

So, what happens when Germany attacks France? France proceeds to slaughter the attackers mercilessly, as it was during the Feudal Ages, a time when France was Europe's superpower.

Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

Why did the black man go to jail? He stole some rice.

What did the monkey say to the newlywed couple? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

If life gives you lemons, You throw them as hard as you can at the nearest stranger. If life gives you melons, You're probably dyslexic.

9/11

What do you call a black person who puts out fires? a firefighter

Knock Knock. What's up? Oh, nothing much, you? Yeah, you know, same old, same old. Cool.

What did the black person say when his white friend said "Nigga!"? "You know, I really don't get racist jokes like this."

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

Barman: Why the long face? Horse: To support my twelve molars and twelve premolars which help me chew grass so I can swallow it properly.

A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I can't believe it," the man exclaims, "I've died and gone to Heaven! I-" St. Peter interrupts him. "Not quite yet, my son. You must first answer three questions. You will only enter Heaven if I deem you fit to do so." The man nervously agrees. "All right. First question," St. Peter says. "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." "Splendid," St. Peter responds. "Did you attend church every Sunday?" The man loses some of his former confidence. "I may have missed the odd week." "That's fine," says St. Peter. "One last question... Do you believe you are worthy of entering the Gates of Heaven?" The man answers nervously, "Well... yes, yes I do." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

Knock, knock. Now before I asked "Who's there" I first opened the door as then I can see who's there without having to ask them through the door.

what do you call a white man who appears to be standing on water? a surfer

What do you call a Caucasian in Russia? Russian.

Here's a riddle: What can you catch, but not throw? A really heavy ball, or STDs.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer caught it.

Q: why did the black man kill the white man? A: he was clinically depressed, mentally unstable, and had a grudge against the white man that had nothing to do with his race.

What is the difference between a black man and a piece of fried chicken? Fried chicken is a breaded meal that is high in calories whereas a black man is an unedible human being with feelings.

Q: How many burgers did little Johnny eat? A: Involuntary erections.

My dad died on Mothers Day, my mother was happy. Actually Iied, we were all sad.

Why wouldnt you want to hit a black man that is on a bike with your car? It mite be your bike

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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