Why did the blonde stare at the juice carton? Because a man was pointing a shotgun at her and would kill her if she didn't do it.

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how do you get a cat out of a tree? shoot it

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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Micheal Jackson walks into a bar

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Roses are chickens violets are pizza this poem makes no sense, Refridgerator

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Take wrong turns

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There is no "i" in "team," but there are two in "indigo."

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Why did the chicken cross the road Because early that morning she had found out that her husband had left her for another chicken. She became depressed and soon was suicidal so she started looking for an option out of her pain. So she tried to cross the road... She never made it.

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What do you call a man with no arms and half an eye? Larry -Jack Sparrow

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So, two black guys walk into a bar... And they pay their tab and couldn't have been more courteous

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PICKLES

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Girl 1- why was 6 afraid of 7? dog- ..................................(doesn't say anything because dogs can't ruff)

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Why did the boy let the falling brick hit him in the head? He had no legs, so he could not move

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What's the difference between Chuck Norris and Bigfoot? Nothing. Their both really hairy.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? An opera singer singing in the shower

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How many Jews can you fit in to a car? Well depending on the car 2-8

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Why did the drunk driver get into an accident? It was a woman.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer was sexually abusive.

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How do you wake up your grandmother........ You don't, she had a massive heart attack and died in her sleep

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Three men walk into a bar, one ducks and two fall down. What happened? They walked into a metal bar, like a sideways flagpole!

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It's green, has four legs and sits in a tree. And if it falls on your head you're dead. A billiard table.

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-I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't

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A man walks into a bar. Sup.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops