why did the chicken cross the road? its a chicken giving it the tendencies to wander if not properly fenced in.

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A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says, "You know, you have a steering wheel down your pants?" The pirate says, "I know, I was just raped by a group of men who thought it would be funny to humiliate me as much as possible. The bartender then called 911 seeing that a horrible crime had just been committed.

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A Black man walks into a bar. He then has a drink of Alcohol and walks home to return to his family.

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- Knock knock. - Who's there? - Jehovah - Jehovah who? - Jehovah's Witness - Go f*** yourself.

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what happened to the fish that got washed ashore? it died due to lack of water-borne air particles.

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Why didn't Josh go to school? On his way to school, a majestic flying homeless man hit him in the head with a sea cucumber.

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jacob mckeand broke his arm and now he cant wank :(:(:(

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm a dog.

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My granddad fell down the stairs the other day... Yeh, we didn't find it very funny either.

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Q: Why are black people so tall? A: Not all black people are tall, and if they are it is probably from their specific genes.

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Why some people don't get the flu twice? Because they died!

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Why wasn't the TV remote working? It was out of batteries.

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How does a Welshman take a shit? Like anyone other human being does.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was curious about something that had diverted his attention.

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What did the autistic man say to the woman? I have autism

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What did the Ethiopian get for Christmas? Nothing.

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What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13

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Why did the fireman wear red suspenders? He'd lost so much weight, due to AIDS.

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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Just the other day there was a house, and unforunatly Bob was a burn victim, the doctors said that he would have had a slow and excruciatingly painful death... Luckily he was already dead!

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I just met you, And this is crazy. So call me Kony, I stole you're baby.

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How do you stop a baby flying 100mph? a shovel

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"Sh*t!" cursed the man. "You're such a potty mouth!" replied the unamused toilet.

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Have you heard about the hipster paleontologist? He liked dinosaurs better when they were underground.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops