Two antennas falls in love. They get married. The wedding was horrible, but the reception was great.

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What did the man with one arm get for Christmas? A benchpress

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Man#1: Who's John? Man#2: John is John. Who else do you want him to be? Why do you ask stupid questions? Are you naturally this dumb? Do you like the questions I ask? Man#1: (Turns away as he is deeply offended by the man who rudely answered his question.)

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

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Why did the Hispanic woman cheat on her husband? Because he couldn't maintain an erection, was boring, and collected stamps.

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What's green and has wheels? Nope, it's a car.

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You know what he said? How did you know what he said?

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house. knock knock..... who's there? the chicken

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raising eyebrows to expose eyes can also be a signal of attraction ('I'm looking at you, gorgeous. Can you see?').

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How do you drown a blonde? hold her head down until she stops breathing

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Your momma is so short, she needed my help to reach something off the top shelf.

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A blind man walks past a fish market then says "why hello lady's" ????

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So he wouldn't become rotisserie with a side of hash brown.

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The Labour Party.

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why did the guy get pulled over he had a broken tail light

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what's the difference between a lion and an ostrich? they are both birds, a part from the lion

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Q:If a tree falls in the forest and nobody is here to hear it, will it make a noise A:That Philosopher probably had a lot of herbal tea in the morning

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What happened to the plumber payed in gum? His family left him because he was irresponsible with his business

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Did you know: it is scientifically proven that people who have more birthdays live longer

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What do you call a white man takeing orders from a black man? Batman and robin

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yo momma is so stupid she went and got her self checked for mental retardedness and it turns out she happens to be autistic.

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theres no 'I' in 'team' but theres an 'I' in 'hitler'

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What did the fireman say to the people in the burning house I'm going to use this water for my sprinkler rather than saving your lives. I might as well use this for something more significan, like my lawn.

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Do they censor Ass? TESTING TESTING ASS ASS ASS

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops