What is green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

How much does the Holo cost? Six million.

This guy was walking down the street and a homeless guy asked him for money. The guy said "Why don't you get a job?" So the homeless guy began to cry because all he wanted was a dime not to be humiliated.

what happened when the shoe turned into a shoe.......... nothing, it was a raisin

What's big fat and ugly? A monster

What did the German say to the Jew? Welcome to Germany we hope you enjoy your stay

A blind man crosses the street... he is hit by a car

why didn't Marlin monroe ( http://fr.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marilyn_Monroe ) use the iphone app guitar hero because she died before the iphone was invented !

What's worse than a rapist? 2 rapists

roses are red violets are blue tis poem makes no sense so screw you

A duck flies into a bar. The bartender allows it to stay because it turns into a beautiful swan. The goose then lays a golden egg and the bartender stares in awe as a giant bean stalk grows out of the egg. He's ecstatic and really glad he let the flamingo stay with all the wonderful colors and magic going on.

why did the little girl fall off the swing she had no arms

See now, that is because you consider yourself my submissive on a both concious and subconcious level, your body and mind wants me to take care of you. I could say it is because I read minds, but why read minds, when I can create them, why read the future, when you can create it. Finally, lets take a look into the word, nerve endings yes? Not nerve endings baby, its called Suggestion. But seriously though, lets put the word nerve endings on top of the word suggestions again there. Nerve endings, did I mention it works on your butt too? You see, usually you would say no, but you do know that now that I am your master, you do and enjoy as I say? See you baby. Moral: "Feel the grove, I control the way you move"

What is white and shaped like a refrigerator? A refrigerator.

When writing haikus Sometimes, I miscount the syllables See, that line has eight.

What is the difference between Chuck Norris and a frog one wears pants and the Chuck Norris doesn't.

How do you blindfold a Chinese man? With a blindfold.

Jack and Jill went up the hill. It was in the middle of winter and they froze to death.

Writing is hard Poems are strong I am muslim And this is a bomb.

Why did grandpa fall asleep naked on a bench? Because his mental condition is slowly deteriorating which is causing him to not be able to properly determine what is and isn't ok to do in public.

Why did the fat guy pick up a noodle from the floor with his buttcheeks? He felt like pasta.

I like touching my boobs

What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

What's worse than dropping your ice cream? The Holocaust

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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