Roses are red Violets are blue, Eat my anus with a spoon.

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Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

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Knock Knock! Who's There! That's right! And now for our next song: "Magic Bus!" One TwoThree Four.....

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There are two types of people in this world, those that can't count

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have Dementia Pickles

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Why can't Susie jump rope? Because she has no arms. Knock knock! who's there? Not Susie.

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The Holocaust? What's worse than finding a worm in your apple.

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how did the tree fall on the woman? it didnt, trees dont grow in kitchens

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why did sally fall off the swings she had no arms knock knock whos there not sally

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A walks out of a bar and the joke is cut off by a-

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Why did billy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him.

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How do you make a mime make noise? Throw a brick at his face

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It's okay, I got the yogurt.

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Why did Jay-Z rob a bank? Wait, nevermind. Jay-Z didn't rob a bank.

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Whats blue and fuzzy? Blue fuzz. Whats pink and fuzzy? Blue fuzz that's embarrassed.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a bad chicken and it burned in hell.

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What's green and has wheels? The farmer's tractor.

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Why do giraffes have long necks? To connect their bodies to their heads.

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Knock Knock Whos there? John John Who Tic Tic BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMM

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A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar. The rabbi says "ow my head"

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why was the black guy that was smoking weed in his car not sent to jail? when the cop pulled him over he thought he was black the way he was dancing but turned out to be white but that just looked black when hes dancing.

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Benny: Hi, my name is Benny, what's your name? A potato: ...

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Shakespeare walks into a bar, Having just seen someone that has been dead for over 400 years, the young man in the corner quits his drug addiction; it was clearly messing with his brain.

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A man came home one day, drunk and feeling horny. He proceeded to the bedroom where he found his wife just getting into bed in a lace bra and sexy underwear. This turned him on even more so he cuddled up to her and whispered seductivly in her ear before kissing her neck. His wife was not in the mood for sex so she shot him

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops