Q: whats better than having sex? A: nothing

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A black guy and a mexican guy are in a car, Who's driving. A policeman.

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What does an emu an a kiwi have in common? Both are flightless birds endemic to there own countries.

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Why did the donkey fall over Because it had A diabetic foot infection and had to have a non traumatic amputation of the lower hind leg.

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What's red ad looks like a green bucket? A red bucket to a color blind person

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How do you teach a black guy to swim? You sign him up for swimming lessons.

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind, black kid get for Christmas? Modern Warfare 3.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I dream of a day when chickens won't be questioned about their actions

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I was wondering why the ball was getting bigger. Then I got stabbed.

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Why doesn't it rain on Sundays? It does.

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Marvin, was in the hospital on his death bed. The family called Marvin’s Preacher to be with him in his final moments. As the Preacher stood by the bed, Marvin’s condition seemed to deteriorate, and Marvin motioned for someone to quickly pass him a pen and paper. The Preacher quickly got a pen and paper and lovingly handed it to Marvin. But before he had a chance to read the note, Marvin died. The Preacher feeling that now wasn’t the right time to read it put the note in his jacket pocket. It was at the funeral while speaking that the Preacher suddenly remembered the note. Reaching deep into his pocket the Preacher said “and you know what, I suddenly remembered that right before Marvin died he handed me a note, and knowing Marvin I’m sure it was something inspiring that we can all gain from. With that introduction the Preacher ripped out the note and opened it. The note said “HEY, YOU ARE STANDING ON MY OXYGEN TUBE!”

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what's black and blue and red all over? nothing, you're and idiot.

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Why did the witch stay up all night with a broken broomstick? Because she couldn't sweep.

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How do you get a women stop running a marathon? You tell her that you have AIDS and she should get herself checked.

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"knock knock" "Come in"

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Man: Want to hear an anti joke? Woman: ok Man: Why did the the girl fall off her bike? Woman: I don't know. Man: She got hit by a refrigerator. Woman: ok

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What's worse than getting hit by a bus? Getting hit by two buses.

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Did u hear bout the guy who went to the donut shop yeah he has brown hair

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead. why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? because it was stapled to the first monkey? why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure.

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How many Frenchmen does it take to surrender? Probably just one.

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What's the difference between a cup of tea and a polar bear? A polar bear is a bear whilst a cup of tea is a beverage

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Tom has 24 cupcakes Tom then ate 24 cupcakes what does Tom have? Diabetes Tom got diabetes

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Wanna know something funny? Your face

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How Many Blondes does it take to open a fridge. 1 Because most blondes are smart and can open fridges.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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