What do you get when you cross a dog with a cat? Nothing, it is impossible to mix 2 different animals

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Your Mom was so fat he made herself Liposuction Twice

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How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None...they can cook in the dark.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

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Who let the dogs out? The dog's owner.

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whats the difference between a pizza and a jew? Pizza is not human, Jewish people are.

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What did the boy eat for dinner? Shit.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Why did the guy eat pizza? Because he likes pizza.

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If the shoe fits....... its probably your size.

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YOU

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Why was the Magic: The Gathering player a virgin? Because he was underage and it would have been immoral for him to have had sex.

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What did catwoman say to batman? meow.

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I wumbo, you wumbo, he, she, wumbo, wumbology the study of wumbo

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A horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'who the f*ck let a horse in here, get it out now'.

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you are looking on the internet someone falls over and i were shoes and chips prevent world war 2

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There was a Jewish man and a German man why was it akward? Because one of them farted

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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what did the oven say to the firdge you hot baby

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whats worse then a child with a dead mom? the baby is still inside.

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A: Rock! B:Paper! C: Siccorz! D: Shoot! D: Jimmy, you alright buddy? I didn't mean for that bullet to hit you man..

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Why couldnt rex bark??? because he was a fish!

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Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Two elves walk into a bar. The hobbit laughs and walks under it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops