Your parents shouldn't have met. I was thinking that as I contemplated suicide.

Hai Patrick Hai Patrick

Camerons hair is Curly..

At first I was at the party and I was like YOLO!! But then I got pregnant and was like yolo....

A horse walks into a bar You have been reading so many anti jokes that you can actually anticipate the anti-joke punchline to this joke, because it is one of maybe 3 or 4.

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger....... unless it is a nonkiller disease that makes you extremely weak :D

why did the chicken cross the road? it didn't it got hit by a bus.

whats the difference between a black baby and a white baby? thier skin tone.

Guy: I have a gun get in my van Girl: SHOTGUN!

What do retards eat for lunch? Grilled Cheese

No your aunties a joke

The blonde, brunette and,the red headed girls were at a store. When the blonde says......... im tired let's leave.

kill yourself....with a cigarette

Strength of body Vs Strengh of Mind. Mind: You can lead a horse to water... Strength: Then you can force that mother*bleep* to drink all you want that *bleep* to drink! Strength of body wins, horseless victory.

Two hunters are in the woods. One of them clutches his chest, falls to the ground, and loses consciousness. In a panic, the other hunter calls 911 and tells the operator that his friend might be dead of a heart attack. The operator says "Before we send a coroner instead of an ambulance, first make sure he's dead." The hunter says "Alright." There is a pause and then BLAM! "Okay," says the hunter, "now what?" The operator follows standard procedures to keep the hunter on the phone, lucid and calm. 45 minutes later, police reach the scene, arrest the hunter and begin a months-long investigation. Forensics determines that the dead hunter was likely alive prior to being shot in the face at point-blank range. The defendant is charged with first-degree murder and receives a 30-year sentence. On the 9th year of his sentence, he is stabbed in the chest 6 times by an initiate in a rival prison gang and dies the next day. He was 53.

Person A: Knock Knock Person B: Who's there? Person A: It's the police, we have a warrant for your arrest. Open the door. Person B: It's the police, we have a warrant for your arrest, open the door wh-- Suddenly the door is smashed open. Tear gas grenades are rolled in, temporarily blinding Person B. He is then dragged out of his apartment by nine federal agents who proceed to beat him and throw him into the back of an FBI van.

Whats long and black and goes around corners? The unemployment line.

A jew walks into a bar. The bartender says we dont sell juice here. The jew promptly leaves, offended.

What did a Chinese man say to the other Chinese man? I don't know, I don't speak Chinese.

Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know because he got hit by a car.

* pretend your an orphan Knock knock Who's there? Not your parents.

Why did the 16 year old black kid drop out of high school? He started a successful small business selling mixtapes.

Hazel and Gus are two teenagers who share an acerbic wit, a disdain for the conventional, and a love that sweeps them on a journey. Their relationship is all the more miraculous given that Hazel's other constant companion is an oxygen tank, Gus jokes about his prosthetic leg, and they met and fell in love at a cancer support group.

Q why was John bullied A Becuase he told kids that bullying was a bad and serious problem to get them to stop bullying jimmy unfortunately Jimmy killed himself because he was bullied to much and didn't want to live.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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