-You know what will always get people fighting? -Hey, you wanna fight?

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What does a dishwasher and the holocaust have in common? Not much.

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what did the guy say to the goose? i know you don't understand but my life sucks. my wife just dumped me for another man and my kids hate me. thank you. you are the only one to understand.

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Q: What do you call a person with no arms and no legs ??? A: Stumpy

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Why did the rooster cross the road? Because he wanted to prove he wasn't a chicken.

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Q: What does Harry Potter say when he answers the phone? A: "No, she's dead. This is her son."

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whats black and white and black and white and black and white? a penguin rolling down a hill whats black and white and laughing? the penguin that pushed him

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test test

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, Humpty Dumpty had a great fall. Due to the height of the fall, one of his ribs pierced his heart and he also suffered extensive head trauma and internal bleeding due to the force when he hit the floor, where he lay in agony for several hours before dying a slow, painful death.

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What did the elf say to Santa I'm not making any more toys fat ass.

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Want to hear a joke? I hope not because I don't know any.

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What is brown and lives in a toilet? A black homeless man

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. 97

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Why did Harry Potter go to meet Professor Lupin? --Because he wanted to practice casting his Patronus

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Roses are red Violets are blue You think this will rhyme But it's not gonna

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Why was the asian a bad driver? Because while he was driving a leprechaun was punching him in the face.

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why did matt daly want to go to prison? to be fondled

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Whats worst than finding a worm in your apple? Going to antijoke.com instead of anti-joke.com

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Weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee weegee

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Finn: Jake, why can your body do all of those magical things? Jake: What do you mean? Finn: Oh never mind. And they both proceeded to enjoy a delicious breakfast.

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How do you get a woman to stop nagging? Smack her in the face.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms

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1234567890? ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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