How many blondes does it take to change a diaper? About a thousand

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What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? AHHHH WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS!?!?!? MY HAND!!! MY HAND!!! AHHHHHHH!!!!! JUST KILL ME!!! PLEASE WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?!?! MY OTHER HAND AHHHH!!! HAHAAAAAAAAAaaaa..... AHHHHHHH WHY?!?! MY LEG!!!! MY FOOT NO!!!!! PLEASE!!!!! Ah AH AHHHHH!

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So, a Bobcat walks into a bar. A few moments later, the bar was empty, save a bobcat and two critically wounded men.

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Two polar bears, oddly enough, are sitting in a bathtub. One of them asks "Could you pass the soap?" The other obliges and gives him the soap.

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What sport was the man with one leg excelling in? Ass kicking.

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Why was the black man running? Because he was playing capture the flag.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because yo mama so fat and the pig ate my poop

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What's worse then ten dead babies in a barrel? The one at the bottom is still alive.

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Q: What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? A: "Get in the car."

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What did one cow say to the other? Moo.

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Why did the boy drop his icecream cone? Because of the shock of seeing his dead family.

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What happens when you Shoot a guy with a red Shirt On? He Dies.

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Why did the kitten cross the road? Because its owners abandoned it.

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A Black man is running down the street with a T.V. He just bought it with the money he is getting from his recent promotion to partner at a local Law firm. He is running because he had to park far away and wanted to get out of the rain.

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You are right, the past still has its claws deep within me thank you friend.

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A Jew and a Neo-Nazi meet in a bar. They put aside their differences and enjoy a few rounds of drinks.

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A man walks into a bar and says Ouch.

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Q:Where did sally go when the bomb went off? A: Everywhere.

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Roses are red, My name is Dave, This poem makes no sense, Microwave.

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What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Why did the dinosaurs go extinct? I don't know.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimer's Roses are red Violets are blue I have alzheimer's

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Relax and enjoy sugartits, you see, I left a last chance for you to shut down the function yourself, when you really want to end it sugartits, you can just read and focus on what I am calling you, sugartits, it really insulted you at first sugartits, but do you see it? Have a nice night sugartits, I mean I sleep like half a hour luckily because of hypnosis and the time control and you know stuff that sounds like its from Sonic or you sugartits. But I gotta go dear sugartits, you want to hypnosis to end, you make it happen by focusing on what I am calling you here.

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What's sad about the Holocaust? Lots of men, women, children were brutally murdered in horrible ways.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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