A apple a day is good for your overall health and you should schedule check ups with your doctor to maintain good health and avoid seeing him everyday.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A blind child sign is at the end of my street. I have never seen the child, but at least if he were to come outside at the right time period i might be able to spot him, whereas he would having no way of returning the gesture.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q:How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A: Well, we can solve this problem of the wood chuck chucking our wood by putting all of your spare wood in a wood chipper. Try throwing dust you chucking bastard.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

3 guys are in a car crap manners and shut up.shut up is driving and crape falls out the window so manners goes and gets him. A cop pulls over shut up.he goes what's your name son?shut up.where's your manners boy?over there picking up crape.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what's the difference between a zebra and a horse They are spelled differently

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why'd The Chicken Cross The Road? He Crossed The Road To Stand In An Icecream Line , Where A Little Boy Stood Infront Of Him, The Chicken Was Scared To Cross The Road Again To Get To The Other Side Because He Saw The Little Boy Get Hit By A Bus. So The Chicken Decided The Best Thing To Do Was To Sit Under A Tree , Where A Big White Thing Fell On Him , It Was A Fridge, Once The Fridge Hit The Ground Mexicans Ran Out And Then Explained To There Local Chickens What Crossing The Street Can Cause Them. To Be Dead. Moral: Dont Let A Chicken Cross The Road. :)

thumb_up thumb_down +2

An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? nothing he was Jewish

thumb_up thumb_down +2

You know what's lame? A person who can't walk.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's dark, has an opening, and guys like to go in it. A cave

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What happened when the boy fell off of the bridge? He died

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's black on top, and white on the bottom? Rape.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Chuck Norris once jumped off of a 9 story building. He broke half of the bones in his body because he is 71 years old.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Your mother is so ugly, her genes were passed down through two generations, and now your children are of a similar caliber of ugliness. I'm so sorry.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What did Osama bin Laden say when he heard loud gunshots outside his millitary compound? A: We'll never find out

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the black guy cross the road? He didn't because he forgot to precede crossing the busy street with caution; therefore he was critically injured and then placed in a hospital.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A B C D E F G.... Gummy bears are chasing me 1 is red, 1 is blue 1 is tryin to steal my shoe now i'm running for my life cuase the red 1 has a knife

thumb_up thumb_down +2

An englishman, a german and a ginger are in a band. they play some creative music that some people may find enjoyable to listen to and would like to purchase a track.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A man walks into a bar he said oww when did this metel bar get here

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Q: what do you call a much green circle that tastes good? A: An avocado

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How do you punish Helen Keller? Sit her in the corner and deprive her of things she likes to do.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

a potato walks into a bar. people stare as it is physically impossible for a potato to walk since it is a vegetable

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's better than eating an orange? Anal sex with Kim Kardashian.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops