How did the black man start his car? He turned on the emission and lightly leaned his foot on either the accelerator or reverse pedal, depending on the position of the car.

Three gay men walk into a bar and there is only one three-legged stool. What do they do? --One man politely tells one of the other men to have a seat and then the two remaining men leave and have a one-night stand.

What did the tractor say to the farmer? Nothing, tractors don't talk

What did the black kid get for Christmas? Presents

Where did Ben go after being hit by a high speed train? Underneath the train's wheels.

One time, I called the police, but it was actually a fire. So my neighbors died.

Where did Mary go when the bomb blew up? Everywhere.

once you go Persian, there is no other alternative

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

Finally, lets take the fight two the streets shall we, no I am not asking, asking is for pussies: YOU VIOLATED AND KILLED MY FATHER! YES YES WHAT IS IT WITH YOU WOMEN ANYWAYS I VIOLATED YOUR MOTHER TOO, BUT YOU DON`T HEAR HER WHINING ABOUT IT! In fact tell her to stop her sending me nude shots, I prefer it when she sends me those she takes of you in your sleep... Your friendly Neighborhood R*pist Moral Man:The day Moral Man graced your village was the worst day of your life, for me it was fathers day! Literally, do you really think I killed your father? I would never comitt suicide! Now, let us celebrate our reunion with some... "Moral WINcest" Barlog: Yes we would like to see the tapes you made for me banging her mother. two Super Turbo edition hours later: YEEEEEEEEEEES! YEEEEEEEEEEEES!

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

If you're American outside of the bathroom, then what are you inside the bathroom? An American inside of a bathroom.

VITAMIN C!

So a blonde a, a red head, and a brunette crash land on an island, they all died within a week...

What did the leperchaun get at the bake sale? baked goods.

How many babies can you fit in an oven? Depends how hungry you are.

Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Good because it is important to keep food chilled to prevent it from spoiling and in turn wasting money

How do you silence Justin Bieber? Hold his head under water until he stops struggling.

Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

What should you do if reading the antijokes on this site makes you collapse with laughter? There is no need to worry about this because it won't happen.

What is the difference between a black man and a piece of fried chicken? Fried chicken is a breaded meal that is high in calories whereas a black man is an unedible human being with feelings.

why did the girl slap joe? he had a boner.

why is the man laughing. he isn't, he's just been informed he has testicular cancer.

Want to hear a dirty joke? Well... I can't tell you. It's inapropriate.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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