Q: What did the floor say to the Christmas tree? A: Your balls are hanging.

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How do the american stop getting fat ? They don't.

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What's the difference between humans and dogs? 4.

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When did the War of 1812 begin? 1963.

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Why doesn't the little boy talk to his mom? Because she smells like barbecue sauce.

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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Roses are red Violets are Blue Let's just screw

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Why would a baby cry? Because it's being put through a juicer.

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What did you say? I'm blind. (Did not write this meaning to be offensive)

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

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How does an Asian person get overweight? By eating food with a great amount of calories and not burning then off in time.

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what do you call a black man, white man, mexican, irishman, indian, and chinese man being hung at the same time? -a racially diverse pirate crew

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know you have to ask the chicken if you speak chicken

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? Misthrown

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Q: What is scarier than the boogie man? A: Herpes

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A Jew, black person, and Mexican jump out of a plane, which one falls first? Who cares they all died

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Now on breaking news!: Man found hanged upside down in a forest with 403 lethal knife-stabs in his back! Policeman: "We have concluded this is indeed the worst case of suicide ever"

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A blonde walks into a bar. She enjoys a refreshing, cold beverage with friends before returning home to sleep ahead of another day of hard work as a scientist.

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do u like chicken ? ....no good...cuz its for black people.

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Q: Whats worse then a minor fender bender? A: Dieing a long painful death by getting stabbed 27 times then getting hit by a car 2 hours later your brother finds you and told you that him and your wife have been cheating on you and your kid is his.

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Wuts brown and smelly? Brown smelly stuff.

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A Catholic priest has the choice between spending an hour with a young girl or a young boy. Which does he choose? Neither because that's illegal and completely immoral for a priest.

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Why can't the toucann fly anymore? Because they're extinct

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Why couldn't Jimmy wash his hair? He has leukemia and therefore no longer has hair.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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