whats worse than a paper cut? 2012

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock knock! Who's there? F*ck. F*ck who? F*ck you.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What happens when you throw a blue rock into red water? It gets wet...

thumb_up thumb_down +10

guest what i love pancakes

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the pretty young girl get for her birthday? Cake and presents (get your mind out of the gutter).

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How many seals does it take to unscrew a lightbulb? Depends on how high the ceiling is.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Who like vibrating dildos? Cammy

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What does pooh bear call his grandma? Pooh nanny.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's white and is your slave? Your computer.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What happened to the guy who bought a nice, brand new, plasma screen t.v.? He hanged himself.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

how do you wake up lady gaga? poker face

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What is Dora the Explorer's favorite food? Pussy.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

ANTONI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Whats blue and fuzzy? Blue fuzz. Whats pink and fuzzy? Blue fuzz that's embarrassed.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

- Women have rights, aren't they? - Yes, they have.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's worse than being named SAID? Having AIDS.. And getting a bee sting - it hurts like ****!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Nothing. His parents are dead and Santa doesn't exist.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A Korean, a Japanese, a Muslim, a Christian, a Jew, a Chinese and a member of Isis are enjoying a friendly game of poker. The Korean man kills everyone because he has a life threatening illness that prevents him from using his brain. The worst news though was that the he lost the game of poker.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did nearly headless nick say when he became headless nick. Nothing because he doesnt have a head

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How many fish does it take to brush their teeth? Jp's worth of fish isn't enough.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the chicken cross the road? He has to on his commute to work. He is a taxpaying citizen who does his 8-5 job to try and cut out a decent living for his wife and kids, so stop questioning the route that he takes to get to work.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What is a jew in space? Dead

thumb_up thumb_down +10

haha

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops