A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

Q: What do you call a innocent black man that was shot 403 times by the cops when they asked for his ID and somehow assumed he was gonna reach for a gun? A: Deceased Texan.

Alcoholic walks into a bar and then walks out because he promised his children and wife that he would straight out his life.

Person 1:"Knock Knock" Person 2: Whos there.... Wait why did you literally say the words "Knock Knock" Person 1: I have no idea

whats a mexicans favorite sport? cross counrty

An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have some pints then leave to do their respective tasks for the day.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What ever happened to Sally? We don't know she went missing over 5 years ago.

Three cows are sitting in a field The first cow says, "MOOOO!" The second cow says, "MOOOO!" The third cow says, "MOOOO!"

Is your refridgerator running? because if its not, you should probably have it looked at by a repair man,

why did suzie fall off the swing? because shes autistic and her mother likes to abuse her.

two men are in a bathroom (note they are not in the same stall) the guy on the left says how are you and the guy on the right says hold on im pooping.

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for winter and now I am dead." It is funny because the squirrel gets dead.

Why did the boy wear a winter jacket on the hottest day of the year? Because the boy was in antarctica and the hottest day was still below freezing.

What do you call it wen black people are sky diving? ...Night

Why was the Jewish boy afraid of an oven? The last oven malfunctioned and killed his father.

You thought i'd be telling you a joke. Turns out im not.. !! haha

What did the fish say when he swam into a wall? Nothing, he was a fish.

They say Jesus Christ walked on water and that humans are made up of 70% water...... So if I walk on babies, am I 70% Jesus?

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the tiger.

What do you call a cow that is lying on a barn floor? A cow

Where can I apply for janitor school?

Why is the wimpy guy so strong and angry now? Because he took steroids.

An English Grammar Expert writes a very intelligent essay.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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