Q: What do you get when you cross Rebecca Black and a day of the week. A: a stupid song called FRIDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You can pick your friends you can pick your nose but you cant pick your friends nose.

Roses are red Violets are blue Last but not least, Bananas are yellow.

Q: What's worse than a pile of dead babies in a truck? A: A pile of dead babies in a truck with one alive in the middle eating his way out.

What do you call a cat with 1 eye, 4 legs, and its tongue out? Road kill.

If pro- is good or favored and con- is bad, then why do people favor the constitution and stay away from prostitution?

Q: How do you make an onion cry? A: You can't, it's an onion.

Why was the pizza mad? Because he was going thorough a growth spurt and the testosterone got to him.

What's as hard as a rock? A rock

Why did the turtle cross the road? Because there was a chicken stapled to his face.

What did the black man buy at the store? Nothing he has no money

a dyslexic man walked his god.

What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

there's a worm in my lime at least it doesn't have scurvy

Spot the mistake: a) x+2= 5 => x=3. b You.

Jimmy Saville

Why did the boy have glass in his mouth? Because he was chewing on glass.

How do you stop the London riots? - You employ a a highly effective police tactic to diffuse the crisis as quickly as possible.

Why can't black people swim? Because there are sharks in the lake.

there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

How did the black man burn down the house. He threw a flaming match through the window.

I have existed for over 6000 years and around vi0lating people long before you where ever born kid... You do not believe me you say? friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: You do not believe me? According to this DNA test... Welcome to papa son/daughter... Its time to make you a man/woman now, and then TIME TO MAKE YOU my BlTCH!

What do you call a Muslim flying an airplane? A pilot, what did you think it was? F**king Racist dumbass

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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