What's white and smells like crap? An albino tird. Just kidding, Justin Biebers music.

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Whats long, hard, and makes a girl excited? A penis.

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kk

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What do you call a kid with leukemia and no arms? Names.

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knock knock come in !

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What funny about AIDS nothing its a terrible disease

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How do you drown a blonde? Intentionally attempting to drown anyone, regardless of their hair color, is murder which is illegal and morally wrong to do.

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What come after 69? Time for you to get a watch

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Why did the prestigious college accept the Native American student? Trick question, Native Americans don't exist anymore.

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You want some cake? Sure! Okay, go buy the ingridients and bake me some. YAY!

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What did the coconut say to the lizard? Nothing, the coconut fell off the tree and killed the lizard.

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What stinks of shit and has money. Smelly Mc Dee I lied about the money.

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69 cents for a rainbow donut shaped as a 69....

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Last Christmas I gave you my heart. I am still waiting for a transplant.....

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Whats worse than one bee? Two bees. Whats worse than two bees? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bees.

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Why was the asian a bad driver? Because while he was driving a leprechaun was punching him in the face.

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How do you kill and red head? Throw your mom at them!

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A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Wha....You probably shouldnt read the rest of this because i lie a lot (This joke deserves lots of thumbs and comments!)

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Why did Jerry Sandusky rape little boys? Because his penis was hard and he needed to get his nut off quick

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I wonder what mute people say to themselves. :/

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roses are red violets are blue holy sh*t slendermans behind you

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Why did little Lynn fall of her bike? Because she has no legs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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