Scenario: Two guys are out hunting. Two guys are walking and a one falls down. The other calls 911 and the guy still standing asks what to do. The person at the hospital told him to make sure his friend was dead, then heard a gunshot. The guy who called said "Now what do I do?"

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A horse walks into a bar. He politely holds the door for a young woman.

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No smoking No eating No drinking On this bus Didn't say anything about sniffing

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Why did the baby die? Lack of oxygenated blood to the brain.

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Q: Why did the man eat the banana? A: Cuz he was hungry!

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Oh you're dating my ex? Do you want my unfinished sandwhich too? And my old shoes? And a couple of my shirts I don't wear anymore? How about a my toys I used to play with? Or my spoiled pickle that's been in my car for about a year and a half after I went to the mall with my friends, we watched a movie, I don't remember which one it was but it was funny, then after that we went to McDonald's and it was the first time I heard of McGangbang and it was pretty good. After that I think we went to Jerry's cousin's house, he was a cool guy until I found out that he likes Tyga, so I ended up never talking to him again.... I went off topic, sorry

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How many babies does it take to cover a roof? Depends on how thinly you slice them.

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why did andy wake up this morning. because he wasnt tired anymore

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What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

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How do you make a firefighter happy? Give him a blowjob and 10 million dollars.

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What did the asian kid do before he got a blood test? He studied.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? having your titties super glued to a triceritops' as cheeks while the triceritops has chronic diahrea

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Teacher- Pick the odd one out- Man, whale, bat, squirrel, frog Student- Whale. All others are found in Nebraska

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what do You call a white man killing a black man? a accident

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Now on breaking news!: Man found hanged upside down in a forest with 403 lethal knife-stabs in his back! Policeman: "We have concluded this is indeed the worst case of suicide ever"

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

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Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

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Q: You know what never gets old? A: The kids in a school shooting

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What is one similarity between John Samos, and the dreadful clown? they have a red nose and are payed to be funny, aside from John Samos!

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what did the apple say to the orange? -- NOTHING! APPLES DO NOT TALK!

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Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: A kid fell in the mud.

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What happened to your face It got hit by a bus By cheyenne

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Why didn't the black kid get anything for Christmas? His family was Jewish.

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Hey! How do you do a four strand plait? With four strands.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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