What does a black kid get for Christmas? Your bike

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What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

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How do you kill a Chinese hobo Shoot him

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jack be nimble jack be quick jack is a parapeligic.....there's no need for more

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Elise's parents have four children. The first's name is April, the second's name is May, the third's name is June. What's the fourth children's name ? July. Elise is adopted, and thus does not count.

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A boy spilt his milk on the floor, and then cleaned it up before his mum got home.

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Q:Why couldn't the man lick his ice cream? A: Because he lost all of his tongue due to the chemicals of cigarettes.

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Why did the tomato fall off the swing? Because tomatoes don't have arms.

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How was the copper wire invented? 2 Jews pulling on the same penny!

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Two guys walk into a bar together. They are diagnosed with a concussion and later on in life have serious brain issues

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Why was it cold in Florida on Monday? Because there was an irregular cold front moving through. The Monday part was just a coincidence.

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What is worde then swallowing a slipper? Swallowing a granny to catch the slipper

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y was John so sad becaus his mom took his phone

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Why did the naked blonde crossed the road? Because she a man

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What do you call a popular rap and hip-hop artist? Tunde

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Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? The door was a loaf of bread.

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Q:why did the guy go to the doctor? A:I dunno, he must have gone for a good reason

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How many blacks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, unless he's short. Then, he'll need a friend to hold the ladder for him.

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why cant the blind man read brail? he has no fingers

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Why did the black man cross the road? He was chasing the chicken

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Nero, I am happy to hear from you again, but it kinda sounds like you are going to get yourself killed or something. Is there something else I can do? If that asshole is suffering, kill him after he is done doing it, I am done with that piece of shit. Honestly, what is going on Nero? You are not going to suicide or something are you? Please respond, right away, or I wont call your wife.

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What's red and every where? A bloody soldier who just stepped on mine.

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A guy walks into a doctor's office and says: "Doctor! Doctor! You gotta help me! One day I'm a teepee, and the next day I'm a wigwam, and then the next day I'm a teepee, and then the next day I'm a wigwam again. The doctor says: Sir, we've been over this 100 times! You have stage 4 pancreatic cancer...

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What do you do when a blonde takes the pin out of a grenade and throws it at you? Take cover as there is a person close to you wielding an active grenade.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops