A man walks into a bar After months of rehab he is giving in to his drinking abuse again and will ruin his life as well as his family

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar Was it you? No

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Who is the dumbest person on the entire internet? Shortpoet-GTD

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Neronism is based on the belief that respect and love for one self and ones opinions, combined with respect and love for the opinions of those which follow the same concepts, is the right thing to do. Now behold what religion has done, it spreads fear and poverty, demands the submission of free will and belief in oneself, which again leads to pedophilia, abuse and discrimination of women, abuse and hate, which breeds life to wars agony, suffering poverty and disease in the name of what defines love these days for some "might exist and be jealous and cruel God which loves you so much, that he gives you the option behind serving him or endless suffering..." Not to mention, this fear of eternal torment, being passed on for generation to generation, creating endless wars since the dawn of mankind. Know that we do consider outsiders inferior, but we do not hate you, we pity you, we will not make you suffer, as you due to your path, suffer enough already. Now ask yourself, if we are what you could say those that represent anti-religion, as we go on knowing this, we can not only do better than religion... ...But the hell if we can do worse! Moral: "We will not walk with pride into the light, we will not go into war against those we disagree with, instead we walk in the dark with humility and listen to our hearts and the one of others in order to find our definition of love and kindness... ...Otherwise Neronism would just be yet another fucking religion, and there is enough of that in this world already. If you listen then you know who I am in spirit, if not then you might have learned something new.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Teacher: What is 1+1? Student: 2 Teacher: Next time raise your hand before answering a question.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Your mom is so stupid, she stole free samples.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why didn't Sally go to the party? Because everybody hates her and she wasn't invited.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Whats gayer then dancing with the stars? Justin beiber

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun. Get in the van

thumb_up thumb_down -34

How can you tell the difference between Brooke Colbert or any other girl Jesse has been with? It's easy, Brooke the only one Jesses ever been with. They even share the same bra size.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What happened when the white man saw a black man running with a purse? He called the police. The police proceeded to chase the black man down tackling him into a dumpster, causing permanent spinal damage. Upon investigation into the situation, the black man was deaf and he was bringing the purse, which contained an epi-pen, to his dying wife a block away. The police officers involved were fired and sued by the family, ruining their lives. Months later they both committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

what do you call 20 black people under the ocean? a tragic boating accident

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Q: What present did the Taliban's wife get on the islamic holiday A: a beating

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Q: What do you get when you mix root beer with a cloud? A: Nothing, you idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down -38

How do you make a dick popsickle? ...IDK! I am asking you because you look gay.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

KNOCK KNOCK. WHO'S THERE? BOO. OH, HEY. COME IN. ....

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Why am I telling you this joke? Because the person who did it before me mentioned that he enterted this, agreed to the Terms of Service and clicked submit - but missed out that he also typed in the capcha. Mine said: never quit.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Forward this anti-joke to at least 15 people And absolutely nothing extraordinary will happen in the next 10 minutes.

thumb_up thumb_down -42

Why am i so sexy? Because a dog raised me.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

whats worse than finding ten dead babies in one recycling bin finding ten dead babies in one trashcan ---sticksack

thumb_up thumb_down -44

There is a tree. its still there. your still reading this, i dont know why, ok im getting sick of writing something that isnt even funny

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Doctor I have a headace! The doctor was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -48

Listen Nero, you are the only one I suspect right now, how do you know all of this? Why should I believe you?!

thumb_up thumb_down -54

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops