What did the elephant say to the other elephant? Nothing. -Albert Einstein... LOL JOKES my name is PJ.

Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad at making jokes And your a jew

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

A plane crashes on the border of the U.S. and Canada, where were the deceased buried? It turns out that there were passengers of several different nationalities on board, all of which were buried in their respective homelands.

An irishman walks into a bar and drinks 6 pints of guiness. He then drives himself home and savagely beats his wife and children.

Why is purple the best color. Cuz icecream has no bones

Why did the cow hail a taxi? Because cows can't drive.

what did the crow say do the dead gazelle? - nothing the crow ate it

Yo momma so fat shes eating right now

Whats the difference between a black baby and a white baby? 15 minutes in the oven.

How do you make a blonde fall off of a cliff? You push her off of the cliff.

Lightning strikes 2 year old baby.

Apple hates Blackberry.

Bob: I have a funny knock knock joke, but you have to start it. Joe: Ok. Knock Knock. Bob: Who's there? Joe: Uhhhhhhh Bob: Exactly.

An englishman, a german and a ginger are in a band. they play some creative music that some people may find enjoyable to listen to and would like to purchase a track.

What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

An old man walks into a bar. He suffered greater injury than a younger man due to his advanced age and deteriorating health. But he did eventually recover by strictly adhering to his doctor's advice of bed rest, improved diet, and increased, yet moderate, aerobic exercise.

Why do black guys always have sex on their mind? Because they are men.

what starts with b and ends with b? The bomb i just planted in your house.

What's the easiest way to get a cat out of a tree? Call the fire department and allow them to safely reach the cat and properly extract it from the tree while you watch from below.

Why did the boy drop his peanuts and crackerjacks? He had a sudden heart attack and died at the age of 10

A black man walks out of a store. He was carrying a receipt.

Why was the sock sad? Impossible. Socks dont have emotions.

Q: Why did the wihte man buy a burger? A: cuz he was hungry

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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