Knock Knock! Who is there? Me. Let me in. Oh, okay, Come in.

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A teenage girl walks into a bar. She sits down and watches the TV up against the wall. The bartender walks by and says "Hello, do you have I.D." The girl says "No, I'm just here waiting for my ride." The bartender then says "Well I'm sorry to have to tell you this but you gotta be 21 or over to sit in the bar." The girl says "Okay, but is there anywhere I can wait that is safe?" The bartender asks "Why?" and the girl replies "Well, I've been hiding from my ex boyfriend. I just broke up with him an hour ago. He was very controlling and he is still not over me. So now I'm here waiting for my new boyfriend." The bartender says "What you have a new boyfriend already? Maybe that's why your ex was angry." The girl says "yeah, I know, oh look there's my ride. It was nice talking with you, have a good night."

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Male orgasm (haha bitches we've been faking it)

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What is the similarity between John W. Booth and Pee Wee Herman? They both got arrested for shooting someone in the back of the head in the theater.

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Do you know whats funny to say to someone unless they're black. Your ma's in jail.

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What did the tramp get for Christmas? Nothing because he's Jewish.

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In order to find a woman, you need time and money. Woman=Time&Money The longer you spend at work, the more money you get. Time=Money Money is the root of most problems in the world today. Money=Problems Therefore Women=Problems

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What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

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What is the definition of child abuse? Ms Bazan

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What do the Africans have for breakfast? Nothing.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? His mother threw a brick at him.

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Ask me about my wiener. How's your wiener? I don't have a wiener, I'm a woman.

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knock knock? whose there? i dont know. i dont know who? i dont know.

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You mama's so fat, that the doctor suggested that she go on a diet.

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Whats worse than going to jail for the rest of your life? Going to jail naked for the rest of your life.

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why did Sallt fall off the swings? she had no arms knock knock who's there not Sally

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Jesus Christ

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My name is Dave I like poems Microwave ummmmmmmmm (enter word that rhymes with poems)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? You reading another one of these again?

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Whats the difference between a kangaroo and a kangeroot ? Ones a marsupial. The others a Geordie stuck in a lift.

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I don't drink. I'm not 21.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why did the naked blonde crossed the road? Because she a man

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Q: What do Captain Jack Sparrow, Captain Crunch, Captain Morgan and Captain Kangaroo all have in common? A: They are all caucasian

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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