What is the weirdest way to get AIDS Having Sex

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Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

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knock! knock! who's there? the police, your family died in a car crash!

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How do u get a baby to stop crawling in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor

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That awkward moment when you get in the van and there's no candy.

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How many apes does it take to put in a light bulb 3

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Your momma is so dumb that her IQ is 3 standard deviations below that of an average person.

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What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my Tractor?"

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The President walks into a local pub. Everyone shits their fricken pants because the President is here.

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why did the teacher quit her job and become a musician? Because her class was very mean to her and growing up she had always wanted to play music

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Roses are red Violets are blue, Eat my anus with a spoon.

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What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew?

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Here comes the bride, all dressed in white. Here comes the groom, carrying a broom, because somebody spilled something on the floor.

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What's the difference between an anti-joke and a joke? The anti-Joke isn't a freaking joke. So stop freaking doing it!

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What did one Teacher say to the other teacher? Nothing. The first teacher has a horrible drinking habbit which is getting out of hand, He beats his wife and children each night after his drinks at the bar. His parents have stopped all contact and he found some divorce papers in his wifes draw, also saying she would be getting full costudy of the children. He has lost the majority of his friends and didnt want to loose another one, and kept his problems to himself.

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What did the boy say after smoking weed for the first time? -"I don't really feel anything" and his friends explained that is sometimes the case for a first time smoker.

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Why did the computer explode into a million peices? It was thrown off the Empire State building.

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Rebecca Black walked into a stadium. There were so many seats to choose from. But, she sat down in the nearest seat she could find and enjoyed the football game.

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why shouldnt you throw a rock at a black person on a bike? Its probably your bike.

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whats worse then getting a parking ticket? the plague

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What is the first letter of the alphabet? A. a B. 7 C. Mustard gas D. Because a penguin has 2 legs

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What happened to Jillian when she walked out the door? She got hit by a bus A. Knock knock B. Whos there? A. Not Jillian

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Why did the Asian student do well in school? Because he worked hard and studied everyday

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What's green and can dance? A Cloud. I lied.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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