Why did the chicken cross the road? He was playing tic-tac-toe with a friend.

To Daniel You must have been born on a highway cuz thats where most accidents happen

Why did the circus clown lose his balance? He had a seizure while on his unicycle, fell off, and bumped his head, leading to significant blunt trauma in the brain. Weeks later, after waking up from a coma, the doctors discover that he can no longer speak anything other than gibberish. His friends and family decide that he cannot go on living this way and decide to pull the plug.

What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing 'cause you done told the b i t c h twice!

What did the little boy do when he got his test grade? Cried, it was 0

How do you drown a black? - pop their lips

What do you call a black man in green shoes and a yellow hat ? Nothing,thats just him pursuing in his own regular casual outfit there for you would just notice him as a normal man walking around with shoes and a hat on so there is nothing to call him

what did the little boy get for christmas? nothing his parents stuck him in a mental ward to forget about him because he was mentally challenged.

what did the chickpea say to the raison when he got called big but? Atleast i dont have a stick up my but.

Why did a black man enter a KFC? Because he had been in town a while and had grown hungry over the period of walking around, and decided he should get some food to satisfy his hunger so he may continue his journey around town. The fact he entered KFC is purely coincidental, as he could've easily decided to go to a different eatery, but it just so happens that the closest one was a KFC.

Why did the Asian ace the test? Because she had worked very diligently, taken copious notses, and studied fervently until she had a thorough mastery of the topic.

What did the deaf blonde say to the brunette? Nothing.

Why did they choose Madonna to perform in the halftime show? Because she might die soon.

Why aren't there any painkillers in the jungle? because of the unethical and unscrupulous practices of big pharma

Whats the difference between a black man and a paraplegic? A paraplegic doesn't walk out on his family

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

Why did a white man get kicked out of the Olympics 2012¿ Because he did not have down syndrome

What is worse than menopause? Falling down the stairs breaking your next....

deez nuts

A man was found dead, in an ice cream van, the other day. He was covered from head to toe in hundreds and thousands, with two flakes sticking out of his ears. The police say it was a tragedy and will be informing his next of kin in the next few days.

person 1: don't look person 2:Why person 1:because my shirt not on and my boobs are jiggiling

How are grapes and squirrels similar? They're both purple. Except for the squirrel.

Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

Why did the skeleton not go to the party? Because without the aid of various ligaments and muscles that would be attached to the average human being's skeleton, he was not able to move himself so much as an inch.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...