What did the drug addict say to the doctor? I am a drug addict and am in need of help and rehabilitation.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q. What happened to the dog when he was kick in the privates? A. Nothing he was neutered a year ago.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How do you make a dentist cry? Kill all his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

If you come to Anti-Joke.com to look at the Newest jokes please leave a comment. Thank you!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

whats funny about four dead horses in a park ? the horses are dead!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the blond cross the road? She needed to get to the shop as she'd run out of milk.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What the difference between a circle and a triangle? You're an idiot if you don't know the difference.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

[Insert anti-joke here]

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? I don't know what they said, but one muffin, had a knife.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

In Soviet Russia, this type of joke would be considered evidence to throw you into the gulag.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding herpes in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How many blonde chicks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to set the house on fire, and the other to call 119.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

troll lololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololololol.olo90ololol.o.ool.olololol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.ol.o.o.lol.ol.ol.ol.!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the man say to the cat? I thought you were fake.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

CJISTHEBEST Sticks and stones may break my bones because i have osteoperosis.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How did the fat man die? He was fed porrage until he died. Who killed the fat man? Leonardo DaVici How did Leonardo Da Vinci die? Natural causes (Actually I have no idea how Leonardo Da Vici died but if I am wrong please correct me) Thank You for your coperation.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Roses are red Violets are blue There's suppose to be a fourth line.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

An asian walks into class to take a math test. He did not study and consistently misbehaves and promptly fails.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the toy cowboy say to the man? Nothing, toys can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why didn't the man walk up the stairs? He had an acorn stairlift.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q: What is every blonde's ambition? A: To be like Vanna White and learn the alphabet.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

And if we met in 1780, I was a white southern aristocratic plantation owner and you were my dark skinned servant lady ... slave Whenever I could get away from the Mrs., I'd go to your shed and then I'd steal you kisses. But let's be serious, I'd still work you full time as a slave, there's a difference between romantic language and a complete disregard for socioeconomic trends.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's up? Up Adverb: Toward the sky or a higher position. Preposition: From a lower to a higher point on (something); upward along: "I climbed up a flight of steps". Adjective: Directed or moving toward a higher place or position: "the up escalator". Noun: A period of good fortune. Verb: Do something abruptly or boldly: "she upped and left him". Synonyms: adverb. upward - upwards - aloft - above - upstairs - overhead preposition. on - upon - over - along - with adjective. rising noun. ascent - rise - upgrade verb. raise - enhance - increase - lift - rise

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's worse than getting no presents for Christmas? Ass-rape!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops