What do you call a middle ages man driving a van filled with children? Coach.

ill take a bullet for you... on call of duty... nahhh that ruins my kd

What's worse than Twilight? New Moon. What's worse than New Moon? Eclipse. What's worse than Eclipse? Breaking Dawn. What's worse than Breaking Dawn? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Breaking Dawn Part 2.

What's the difference between Rebecca Black and your mom? Nope! Chuck Testa.

Whats worse than the holocaust? Sex with helen keller.

Today we eat large amounts of pizza. The one piece had a lot of mushrooms. Like more than the other pieces. The cheese was flawless except for the burnt edges.

Why bouriquet fall off the swing? Ask him.

"You just went and made a new dinosaur?" "And due to its well-developed core muscles the staff behind Jurassic World has called it - 'ABDOMINUS PEX'." "That's a stupid name."

A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

Why did the boy fall off his bike? He was mauled by a bear!

Mary had a little lamb. Then Died.

Wanna know a Chuck Norris fact? He is 72 years old and likely to die soon

How do unwed mothers celebrate Mother's Day? The same way all mothers do.

What happened to the Asian who ran into the wall with a boner? He ejaculated his sperm, impregnating the wall. The wall went to the authorities, and the man was charged with rape. He is now serving a 10 year prison sentence, with no possibility of parole.

The baby started screaming in the dead of night. It woke up his mother, but his father did not be woken by it. why? Because the father left the mother some time ago, and emigrated to Australia with a new girlfriend, who is incidentially a model, and therefore he could not have heard hs child scream whilst on the other side of the world. His new girlfriend dosen't like him.

First the lord created light by shouti... ...Then the lord travelled back in time in order to create voice before that. The lord then said "I almost logic and everything failed at the very beginning. he corrected himself and saw it was good,

Why did the little girl cry when she fell off the slide? Because when she fell she hit the dirt ground, cause dust to fly into the air, he eyes started to water in response to keep her eyes from being damaged. The slide however, was taken down, too many children had been hurt while playing on it. The community is now pooling money together in order to build a new playground.

What happens when u mix water and soda? You get watery soda

How do you acquire a bomb? Go to the bomb store.

How many Anne Franks does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, cause she's dead.

What did the furry tweet when he went to a furry convention? A: I'm at a furry convention

Timmy eats 32 cookies and eats 30 of them. What does he have? Type 2 Diabetes.

a gay guy is in a club, from across the room he sees another attractive man with now shirt and he gets an erection.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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