Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why didn't the octopus have any friends? Because they are antisocial creatures by nature. -Louis

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you do when a blonde takes the pin out of a grenade and throws it at you? Take cover as there is a person close to you wielding an active grenade.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A guy walks into a doctor's office and says: "Doctor! Doctor! You gotta help me! One day I'm a teepee, and the next day I'm a wigwam, and then the next day I'm a teepee, and then the next day I'm a wigwam again. The doctor says: Sir, we've been over this 100 times! You have stage 4 pancreatic cancer...

thumb_up thumb_down -7

So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

in superbad, why couldnt seth take off mclovin's face and wear it as his own? no one can. theyre fictional characters in a movie

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She got shot in the head by her drunk step-dad.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Roses are red. Violets are red. Daisies are red. WHY IS MY GARDEN ON FIRE?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

I don't drink. I'm not 21.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a man with no arms in the middle of the ocean? Mike.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the drug addict say to the doctor? I am a drug addict and am in need of help and rehabilitation.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

whats worse than finding out there's mold in your bread? finding out the holocaust is in your bread

thumb_up thumb_down -11

why did the guy laugh at everything he was high

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Suck pussy

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? X box Kinect

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the woman go out of the kitchen? She did not because she had a curse put on by a man off the streets of Greek row a Yale that said u may never leave the closest kitchen near this very spot, and it turns out that the closest kitchen was in a frat house across the street so now she is stuck in the kitchen making sandwiches for all the frat bros at this Yale frat house, So basically she was in her place

thumb_up thumb_down -11

I road a horse to school. My friend stabbed it with a Javelin and screamed.... The horse was his Dad

thumb_up thumb_down -11

whats worse than walking in to the doctors office and he says you got aids heaps of stuff can be worse but haha you got aids

thumb_up thumb_down -11

How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics? Winning two gold medals.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a person with 4 arms? A normal person. (fore arms) (meant to be audible)

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What's weirder than an asian? His dinner

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why was the multi-millionaire entreprenuer sad? He went bankrupt.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

a man walked into a bar, sat down and had a drink with his friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops