What do you call a gay kid, a horrible singer, and has long hair for a guy? Justin Bieber

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Why did mallisa get to go to the bar instead of jeremy... jeremy has prostate cancer and he needs to be examined every 2 1/2 minuites plus he's 7 years old.

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My grandma has this joke where she says "knock knock." I say "who's there?" She says "I can't remember" and starts to cry

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Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Getting mauled by a pack of hungry wolves

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how do you upset an obese cat? you put her in dog sweaters

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What did the black man get for Christmas? Presents

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"I'm gonna fight fire with fire!" "won't you just get more fire?" "True..."

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What is stupid and looks like you? You.

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How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Ebola is present And so are u

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit.

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Hay is for horses and other hay consuming mammals.

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A man walks into a bar with a giant banana as a head and the bartender asks why he has a giant banana as a head and the man says get me a drink and i will explain, the bartender got the man a drink and he started to explain why, so i found this real nice golden lamp and i rubbed it next thing you know this genie pops out and he said i get three wishes the first one he wishes for unlimited wealth with a snap of the genies fingers the wish came true next he wished to be the most handsome man ever with a spin and a snap the wish came true but this is where it went wrong, I said to the genie and i cant believe he got me with this one (because genies always put a twist on things) i said: i wish for my head to be a banana

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An asian walks into class to take a math test. He did not study and consistently misbehaves and promptly fails.

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why did bob eat the cookie? because he was hungry

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why did the guy laugh at everything he was high

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Bird is the Word. Actually 'What" is the word.

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What is the difference between a baleen whale and a black guy? One speaks and one says EEEEEEERRRROOOOOWWOWOWOWOOWRR!

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how do you confuse a blonde? tap her on both shoulders

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What do you call a woman with one leg shorter than the other? Whatever her name is.

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"How high are you?" "I don't know, sir." "Well, look at the god damn altimeter."

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Who's Juan? DIS ONE

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What do you call a dog with no arms and no legs? Nothing, it cant come

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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