What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A jew is a human being who will understand and laugh at a joke, while a pizza will just sit there because it is only a delicious thing that people eat.

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Roses are gray, violets are blue; I'm red-green colorblind so I occasionally have difficulty seeing most shades of red or green.

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A gorilla walks into a bar. It goes on a killing spree, and is promptly put down by animal control.

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Q. Why do cheetahs run so fast? A. Because their bodies allow them to.

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Myth: Everyone but redheads has a soul. Fact: No one has a soul.

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Josh Moran sticks CD's up his dick to see how fun it is to give a boy anal.

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Why are the dinosaurs extinct? A meteor hit the Yucatan Peninsula and caused a blast that covered the earth and killed them all.

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Q. If you're paddling up river and you lose three tires, how many pancakes does it take to cover a doghouse? A. Purple because ice cream has no bones.

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What do you call a white sheep with no legs? A cloud What do you call a black sheep with no legs? A shit.

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When is a bus not a bus? When it turns into a street

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What do you call a white man without a face? Dead. What do you call a black man without a head? Negger.

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oh hai i'm al gore reduce ur carbon footprint lolz

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Q: What's worse than a baby nailed to a tree? A: Ten babies nailed to eleven trees.

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Why was the giant centipede full? Because it just ate half a dozen purebred golden retriever puppies by hiding all day in the poopy newspapers and emerging at night to eat the defenseless baby dogs in their sleep. BUM BUM BUM KSSSH!

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Is this the Krusty Crab? Yes.

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A boy's parents buy him a Wii for Christmas. The boy hangs himself the next day because you need arms to play Wii.

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How do you get a woman to stop nagging? Smack her in the face.

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What has Whitney Houston got in common with a spider? They're both black and they can't get out of the bathtub

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A guy walks into a bar. The second guy ducks.

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What happened when the white man went to Nigiria? He turned gray.

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Is it considered sexual harassment if a midget says to a woman, "your hair smells nice"? Holy crap i don't like black people.

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What do you say if you see a black man with blood on his hands and he has a mask on? Thank you doctor for saving my sons life!

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Wha do you call a couple with aids? 2 pepole who need immediate health treatment.

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Your momma is so fat, she should be concerned about her increased risk if a heart attack because of her poor eating habits.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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