Why couldn't the pirate go to the movies? He had scheduling conflicts

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Katy perry isn't on clould nine because it's physicaly impossible to stand on water persipitation.

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I have two coins in my hand that add up to 30 cents, and one of them is not a nickel. I accidentally dropped them.

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Why do asians get good grades? Because they study very hard and want to achieve success so they can provide for their families.

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A girl asks a Croatian bartender for a beer, the bartender replies, 'There is no beer in this bar.'

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Q: What's worse than being stung by a bee A: The Rwandan Genocide

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"Horse walks into a bar. Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from. So, you should probably leave."

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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Why are asians bad drivers? Driving schools in asia are severely less developed and therefore produce less experienced and skillful drivers. They also have asian eyes (:

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why did the geman man hit the jewish man? because the jewish man swung a punch at the german man so it was an act of self defense.

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What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

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Roses are red Violets are purple. I just realized that nothing rhymes with "Purple".

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Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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FIONN'S ECONOMICS GRADE

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Why did the pelican cross the road? The man did not reply because his mother recently died in a car accident while crossing the road. She also loved pelicans.

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roses are blue viloets are red this poem doesnt make sense microwave

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what did the soup kitchen give people for christmas Meatloaf] -Fluzturnusturbusturcusterdustur

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? I'm a talking banana; what more do you want from me?

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Repeat after me... I'matote ulbu twad Now say that all together Im a total butt wad

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Three men are walking, the first one walks into a bar. He has a couple of drinks because he is depressed. He drives home, drunk, and dies in a car accident. His wife finds out and hangs herself.

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So, Helen Keller walked into a bar....and then a stool, and then a counter, and then a table....

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How did Bella fly? Very badly.

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Roses are red Violets are blue There's suppose to be a fourth line.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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