Q: What do you get when you mix root beer with a cloud? A: Nothing, you idiot.

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why does chuck norris not have a middle name? because his parents didn't want him to have one.

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Why didn't the black kid get anything for Christmas? His family was Jewish.

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What did Ghandi tell St Peter as he passed through the Gates of Heaven? He didn't. There is no afterlife.

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What happened to the plumber payed in gum? His family left him because he was irresponsible with his business

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What did the boy say to the elders at the senior center? Dayum, you're all ugly!

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How many dead babies can you fit in an oven? Depends on if you put them in the blender first.

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Mother Theresa, Billy Graham, and Joseph Smith walk into a bar. Just kidding, no they didn't.

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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It is wrong to strip a homeless man of his clothes and chew his face off. Note to self: Explain this to someone before they have taken bath salts.

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Q: What's circlular and has two hands? A: A skinny person, i was kidding about the circular part!

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why was six afraid of seven? it wasn't. numbers dont have feelings.

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Why was the young girl sad? A doctor told her that due to the fact that she was recently raped, she contracted AIDS.

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Rap. Skate. Smoke.

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how long is a chinese name. how long. yup.

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haha women's rights.....what a joke.

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What's better than finding Jesus in your room? Finding Chuck Norris in your bed.

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What's the deal with airline food? Food tastes different on an airplane. The atmosphere dries out your nose, the air pressure numbs 1/3 of your taste buds, and low humidity levels give you cotton mouth. These factors cause the food to taste worse than it normally would.

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Why do things made by Glen taste so good? Because he has mastered the cream

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why did the monkey fall? he got hit by a train

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Just so you are warned here folks, some of the jokes down here are really nasty, like you know... Antijokes... But luckily you got my family friendly stories about sex, incest, panties, grenades, dripping Meows, yeah... Regular family show stuff... IT HAPPENS TO US ALL! Right? Please tell me right? Riiight? Right? Yes? Phew, okay, for a moment I actually thought you where gonna tell me I was normal...

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why was the jew shaking hands with a nazi? they realized their differences and were bonding.

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Why is Timmy afraid of x-rays? The last time Timmy had an x-ray, the radiation was too much for him, giving him terminal cancer, which also explains why he will die in the next 24 hours.

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Why did the hippo drink the water? Because it was thirsty

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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