What did the strawberry say to the elephant? Nothing. Because it's a strawberry and strawberries can't talk.

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What did John say to Tim Hi I'm John

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Why do birds suddenly appear? Because they can fly

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alex and clayton are having sex at school. at that point, their teacher walks in and tells clayton about the dangers of unprotected sex.

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knock! knock! who's there? the police, your family died in a car crash!

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A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

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What do you call man with no limbs or a head? Your neighbor.

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2 * 2 * 2 * 3 * 2417

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

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KANE AUDITIONS FOR BRITAINS GOT TALENT SIMON COWEL REAPES HIM

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What do you call a chicken with no feathers, no guts, and no head? Fried chicken

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Why did the short man fall down the stairs? He got shot in the face with an assault rifle.

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What do you get if you mix a baby with a blender? A prison sentence.

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wow, that guy is such a buzz-kill. worse than Buzz Killington!

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? I'm a talking banana; what more do you want from me?

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a man walks into a bar... he was shot to death because he was a slave during the 1910s

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If you have three ice-cream cones, and you give away two, how many do you have left? Why would you give away your ice-cream? Eating it is the better option.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? Because she has no arms. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

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Yellow People !!

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A horse and a penguin and a kangaroo come into a bar and order drinks from the bartender, who later gets fired for taking acid while working.

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Why was the Saudi Arabian terrorist flying a plane in America? He was going to visit some family on a ranch in Kansas.

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Knock Knock! Who is there? Me. Let me in. Oh, okay, Come in.

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Male orgasm (haha bitches we've been faking it)

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A teenage girl walks into a bar. She sits down and watches the TV up against the wall. The bartender walks by and says "Hello, do you have I.D." The girl says "No, I'm just here waiting for my ride." The bartender then says "Well I'm sorry to have to tell you this but you gotta be 21 or over to sit in the bar." The girl says "Okay, but is there anywhere I can wait that is safe?" The bartender asks "Why?" and the girl replies "Well, I've been hiding from my ex boyfriend. I just broke up with him an hour ago. He was very controlling and he is still not over me. So now I'm here waiting for my new boyfriend." The bartender says "What you have a new boyfriend already? Maybe that's why your ex was angry." The girl says "yeah, I know, oh look there's my ride. It was nice talking with you, have a good night."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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