Why did sally fall out of the tree? Because sally was morbidly obese and uprooted the tree from underneath her subsequently causing her to splash violently on the ground. Why didn't sally get back up? Because the splash caused the earth to spin at 40000 rpm into the sun.

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What did the cheerleader get for christmas? Money, because she's a stupid w hore

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Knock Knock. Who's there? I left my car keys inside.

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Dislike if you are a prostitute

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What does a black person and ebola have in common? They both kill people

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Roses are red Violets are blue Your mom likes dick and so do you

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A horse walks into a bar. He politely holds the door for a young woman.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm really drunk so show me your tits.

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What is the fastest bird in air? NONE WHO NEEDS TO RIDE BIRDS WHEN YOU HAVE AIROPLANES!!!!

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Q: How do you drown a black guy? A: Hold his head underwater and sit on his back.

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If i had a dollar for every time Lindsay Lohan Crashed a vehicle......i would be rich

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Why did the black guy not like oreos? because he is a very health concious person and knowes that too much of a bad thing can make you fat.

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What is worse than ten babies in the street, eleven babies in the street.

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So a woman took her drivers test today Since she passed, and tomorrow is her 16th birthday, tomorrow she will have the legal privlage to get her license.

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Why was King Triton mad at Ariel? Her grades were under the C.

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Why Americans are so bad at League of Legends? Because they can't defend their towers.

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What's black and runs fast? Newsflash: Most of you are racist.

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What's better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics? Winning two gold medals.

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Your momma soo fat.... that if she doesnt start exercising and eating right she will be more likely to get adult onset diabetes.

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what's the difference between northerners and southerners? southerners live to the south of birmingham, and they don,t stink of urine.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesnt rhyme And your entire family died trying to fly to your house for Christmas. They crashed into a orpanage for death children. There were no survivors.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? "I'm going to kill everyone you've ever loved you fucking cocksucker, you think you can get away with sleeping with my wife? You better think again kiddo I will take away everything from you until you are reduced to a smoldering ruin of what you once was, mark my words bitch."

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What dod the boy with no arms get or christmas? Nothing he can't open them!

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If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put my sausage in your oven

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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