Why did the chicken cross the road? Because grass don't eat meat.

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Q: whats funnier than watching a black man and a midget fight? A: anything technically, your opinion

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Slowly being tortured to death.

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What is long, hard, and full of semen? An erected penis.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no one can draw a perfect circle.

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What do a worm and a human have in common? They both have arms and legs apart from the worm

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Oh you have herpes? yeah, there's an app for that.

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NEVER

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What's pink fluff? Pink fluff. What's blue fluff? Pink fluff holding it's breath. What's red fluff? Angry pink fluff. Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a tr-- No. What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple, 'cause the other half's in your mouth. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Angry pink fluff. What's worse than angry pink fluff? The holocaust. That's not funny. Stop laughing.

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Q: What did the giraffe say to the sunflower? A: I like your shoelaces!

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychological disorder.

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He who laughs last gathers no moss.

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A man asks his doctor if you can die from drinking to much water. The doctor replies 'Yes you can'

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? X box Kinect

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what did the jew get for Christmas? cancer. and aids

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Guess what my dad got me for my birthday? NOTHING, he left my mom and I when I was a baby.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? A seal.

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An old man walks across the street. Several cars start to honk in irritation, for they are in a hurry and the man is walking quite sluggishly.

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one time at band camp there was a guy guess what he played? no one knows

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give a man a blow job and he'll come for a second. teach a man to blow job and .... no that just doesn't work

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Just kidding, he didn't cross the road, he had no legs.

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Two Mice are sitting on a bridge , one falls down an the other is named Charlotte

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How many black people does it take to tar a roof? Just one. Unless he wants to do it in a shorter amount of time and calls a few friends to help him.

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FOX News: Fair and balanced

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops