Why did the pumpkin when orange is not a letter in Spanish? Because moon shoes are der milf

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What do you call an Asian guy doing homework? A student

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Roses are red,violets are blue, i love the colour red and green but its a pitty because im not so keen.

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Why did the old man throw the clock out the window? Because he didn't want to go to a store that could repair it, so then he thought that it was better off on his yard where it could compost.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra drinks a bear and leafs .....

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A man walked into a bar. He sat down, had a nice meal and went home relatively satisfied.

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1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

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Q: What do you call a black man with no arms and no legs? A: Whatever his first name is.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i thought violets were violet. hmph.

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How many blacks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One, unless he's short. Then, he'll need a friend to hold the ladder for him.

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What did the black man do to the white woman? I Dont KNow ask him

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If a large bear falls out of a tree, why would a giraffe also eat the cheese?

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i'm hard

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9/11 my birthday

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Q. Why did Lucy fall off the swing? A. She had no arms Q. Why didn't she get back up? A. She had no legs Q. Why did no one help her up? A. She had no friends Q. Why did Lucy fall off the swing A. She had no arms You: knock knock Other person: who's there? You: not Lucy

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how do you upset an obese cat? you put her in dog sweaters

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Yo momma so old that she has started to look into an affordable life insurance plan to ensure all her final expenses are taken care of.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, We have your test results, You have cancer.

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Your momma soo fat.... that if she doesnt start exercising and eating right she will be more likely to get adult onset diabetes.

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What did one Teacher say to the other teacher? Nothing. The first teacher has a horrible drinking habbit which is getting out of hand, He beats his wife and children each night after his drinks at the bar. His parents have stopped all contact and he found some divorce papers in his wifes draw, also saying she would be getting full costudy of the children. He has lost the majority of his friends and didnt want to loose another one, and kept his problems to himself.

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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When Chuck Norris claps, his two hands slam together, creating rather loud soud.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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What happened when the princess kissed a frog. Warts, all over her lips

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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