I wear my sunglasses at night. I'm always getting into car accidents.

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Hey do you have a suitcase? Why? I need one.

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there were two cyclists cycling down a main road in china at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace, one being chinese and the other irish. why did the irish man get stopped and the chinese man not? because the irish man had in fact raped and murdered a young child in his native home town and then fled the country to china.

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You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but you can't divide by zero.

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Why was the cat meowing really loud? It was on fire. Why did the cat suddenly stop meowing? It died.

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you will like this because i am black.

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what happened to the little girl when she crossed the line she was shot. shes mexican

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there are two muffins in an oven one muffin says "whoa, its hot in here!" the other says nothing, because it is a muffin, and the other muffin, in reality, said nothing either.

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What do you call a Muslim flying an airplane? A pilot, what did you think it was? F**king Racist dumbass

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm not good at rhyming turd

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What do you call a person with one eye and no arms? Names.

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Roses are Red I shit in your Stew When you eat it The joke is on you

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Yar! What be a pirate's favorite football team? The Steelers. I'm originally from Pittsburgh.

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why did the man fall down? because he was shot.

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There's a Mexican and a black guy in a car... Who's driving? The Cop!!!

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Your mums so tall, she's above the average height of women for her age.

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What's more fucked up that the Bill Cosby rape accusations? Sam and Adele's shower time on a Wednesday night

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So seriously you have never ever played videogames before?

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A horse walks into a bar and the bar tender asks "Why the long face?" The horse says nothing because its a horse. It then poops on the floor and leaves

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Q: Why did the guy fall off his bike? A: He got shot!

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What do you get when you put a blue bucket in the red sea? it gets wet

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Why didn't Johnny's father come home? He was killed in Afghanistan.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? An X-box, a sweater and some socks.

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Q: What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a sheep? A: A genetic aberration that is an insult to both God and man.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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