This guys grandma comes to live with him. While shes there she has a stroke. He rushes her to the hospital and waits for her to come out of surgery. The doctor comes out and says "i got good news and bad news" The guy says " give me the bad news" the doctor says "your grandma has had a massive stroke and wont be able to go to the bathroom by herself or eat by herself, so you'll have to feed her baby food and change her Diaper for the rest of her life." So then the guy goes " well shit whats the good news" The doctor goes "Ahh im just kidding she died"

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Q: What's green and has four wheels? A: A green car.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga in the morning You poke her face

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Read a Book.

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Yolo Pierre because of Etzio tickle shits faggatron and individual nut join forces to become the shit suckers

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Why did the college student post unfunny anti-jokes on anti-joke.com? Because he was bored shitless.

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What do you call a black man on the moon An astronaut

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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What did the doctor say to the person who is suffering from obesity? Run fatass Run

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Yo mommas teeth are so yellow that.....I reccomend she see a dentist.

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what did the duck with roller skates say to the camel? how are the wife and kids?

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There was a little boy and a little girl in a bathtub having a bath. Suddenly the little girl looked down at the boy. "Can I touch it?" "No way -- you already broke yours off!"

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Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

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What do you call a black teen on Maury Povich? A mother.

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How do you kill a black man wearing a bullet proof turbin? Shoot him anywere other then his turbin.

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A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says "You have to stop masturbating." The man says "What, why?!" The doctor says "So I can examine you."

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roses are red, violets are purple, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

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(To the pretty girl at the bar) "Was your father a thief? Because I really would like to have sexual intercourse with you."

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What did the Amazonian tribesman say to the European explorer? Nothing, he was focussing on eating him.

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Once there was this duck. he was the best dentist in the world...

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whats the difference between 69 and 6.9 theres a period in the middle

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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