Your mom is so fat that she has trouble walking up the stairs because she gets easily winded.

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Rose: Mom, why was I named Rose? Mom: Because when you were born a rose petal landed on your head. Rose: Than why is my brother named Brick? Mom: I liked the name.

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How do you acquire a bomb? Go to the bomb store.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it died. Q: Why did the dog fall out of the tree? A: Because it was tied to the monkey.

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Two guys fight over a girl. The girl gets up from under them.

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Why is purple the best color. Cuz icecream has no bones

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Whats the difference between a soccer ball and a baby? Babies cry when I kick them.

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So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

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How do you confuse your algebra teacher? Tell her to prove that she exists.

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What did the black police officer say to the white police officer? We just got a call in. Four dead children were found in an alley behind a mall.

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Women's Rights

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Why is Michael J. Fox so go at dance? Because he took lesson as a child

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A blonde takes a test. She scores higher than her Asian friend.

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What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

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Q: Whats white and fluffy? A: White fluff

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Roses are red violets are blue shes for me not for u if by chance u talk my place ill grab my fist and smah your face

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Have you see stevie wonders house? No. Neither has he.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not your grandma! Cause she's dead! Come to the funeral

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A detective? I think more about that chip and dale thing, that was not funny, the classics are okay I suppose, but that newer thing detective-ish maybe. Uh... Do I get a clue? I have not like watched all of them.

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Your mother is so ugly that her physical appearance causes her to have a low self-esteem.

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Whats the difference between a baby in a comma and an iPod? I actually use the baby.

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How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

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One day a black man went and bought a car with his own hard-earned money.

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Why did the pumpkin when orange is not a letter in Spanish? Because moon shoes are der milf

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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