Why did the blond cross the road? She needed to get to the shop as she'd run out of milk.

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Why cant Helen Keller drive a bus? Cuz she's dead!

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So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

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in superbad, why couldnt seth take off mclovin's face and wear it as his own? no one can. theyre fictional characters in a movie

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What did the drug addict say to the doctor? I am a drug addict and am in need of help and rehabilitation.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She got shot in the head by her drunk step-dad.

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Daisies are red. WHY IS MY GARDEN ON FIRE?

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I don't drink. I'm not 21.

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What do you call a man with no arms in the middle of the ocean? Mike.

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whats worse than walking in to the doctors office and he says you got aids heaps of stuff can be worse but haha you got aids

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How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

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whats worse than finding out there's mold in your bread? finding out the holocaust is in your bread

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why did the guy laugh at everything he was high

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Why did the woman go out of the kitchen? She did not because she had a curse put on by a man off the streets of Greek row a Yale that said u may never leave the closest kitchen near this very spot, and it turns out that the closest kitchen was in a frat house across the street so now she is stuck in the kitchen making sandwiches for all the frat bros at this Yale frat house, So basically she was in her place

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a man walked into a bar, sat down and had a drink with his friends.

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Why do cows say moo? Because it's a cow

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What's better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics? Winning two gold medals.

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Why was the multi-millionaire entreprenuer sad? He went bankrupt.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? X box Kinect

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Suck pussy

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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the person who wrote 1 under me is gay

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Why can't basketball players play hockey? Because hockey and basketball season occur at the same time.

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If the goverment wants us to be eco friendly then why are the eco friendly cars so expensive?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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