What did the cricket say to the fox? Cricket.

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Rose: Mom, why was I named Rose? Mom: Because when you were born a rose petal landed on your head. Rose: Than why is my brother named Brick? Mom: I liked the name.

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Whats the difference between a baby in a comma and an iPod? I actually use the baby.

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Yes

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What did one dog say to the other dog? Bark.

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whats the difference between a baby and an onion? no one cries when u chop up a baby.

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Why did Jim go to the hospital? To get an autopsy.

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

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How did the Mexican get across the boarder? He applied for a student visa. He was a promising young scholar who had no trouble being accepted to a prestigious college.

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What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill.

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whats the difference between a can and a fish?they can both swim. exept for the can.

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A little girl meets a homeless guy named Ian McDermott in downtown Atlanta She then screams stranger danger and a nearby policeman comes and arrests the man.

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Why was the house on fire? A dog peed on it.

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Who would win if Chuck Norris and God fought to the death? None they are both fictional.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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Q: Why did Timmy cry? A: You would too if you had your arm cut off

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What is blue and has to deal with a vagina. Blue waffle you know who has that Jews But the jews got it from the gassing and the gassing got it from hitlers wifes piss but the blue waffle came from the lesbian she had sex with when she was doing her lesbian phase but the lesbian got it from her father and the father got it from his wife.

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What did the girl say before she jumped a bridge? "Do you think I can jump off this bridge?"

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What do you hear when the world trade center collapsed?, no seriously I wasn't even three yet.

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What would Osama Bin Laden be doing if he were alive today? Drowning

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Why did the bus drop his icecream? He was hit by a boy

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I'm a burrito... With a big shirt.

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What did the cat say to the dog? Meow.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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