Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, most likely nobody

If all ziggles are zaggles and all zaggles are zumbles, then why is your mother a whore?

What do I have in common with your mum? We're in the same bed right now.

If these walls could talk - the public would pay large sums of money to see this marvel of science. On a more serious note, they might also tell the cops about the many dead hookers stowed within them.

There were two penguin's sitting in a bathtub. The first penguin says to the second penguin, "Hey, pass the soap." And the second penguin says, "What do i look like, an alarm clock?"

A deaf man walks into a bar. Someone yells, "FIRE!" and everyone evacuates. The deaf man does not hear him and dies horribly.

My Penis is so big. How big is it? If you lay my penis down beside another similarly lengthy object, approximately 10" long, it would most likely surpass the length of the object you chose to measure it to.

What's a worse place to be besides the friendzone? On your grandmas lap crying because your parents just died in a car crash.

whats the difference between a can and a fish?they can both swim. exept for the can.

what do a toothbrush and an ice maker have in common? ....They're both in your house.

A black man bites into a watermelon. Just kidding he was white.

Two members of the KKK walk into the bar into a bar. The bartender asks, "what do you think of Obama?" One of the KKK members says "he is my President, I respect him."

What did the black kid get for Christmas? An X-box, a sweater and some socks.

Yo momma so fat she couldn't even fit in a house

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, there are many theories as to why the aforementioned chicken crossed the aforementioned road. The most plausible is that the chicken was wandering around, when it came upon a road. Being a chicken, it did not know the dangers of crossing it, and proceeded to.

A boy walks into his friend's house for a party. While he waits for his friends to return from the bar he realizes there are many people waiting in different lines for various kinds of drinks. After his friends return he decides he does not want any of the carbonated drinks they had ordered, instead he chooses to wait in the fruit punch line. There is no punch line.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: I didn't get to ask. He got hit by a car.

If u give brandon a stick he will most likely poke u

rozes r read violots r bue i cannt soell causse ima bliend

When life gives you lemons, take them. Free stuff is cool.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out your boyfriend's gay

Why did the black man go to jail? Because he committed a criminal offense.

What's black and has ne education? A tire.

2 moose sitting in a tree, suddenly there came a boat and landed in the tree next to them, then said one of the moose, he probably lives there

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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