A Quadriplegic walks into a bar.

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers.

Yo mama's so fat because her BMI is considered obese on the scale.

What's similar between a black man and jelly babies? Nothing

Why do elephant tusks stick out? For uprooting trees and bushes, and for defending their young.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Exercise

Three old ladies were sitting on a bench. A man walks up and flashes them. The first old lady had a stroke. The second old lady had a stroke. The third old lady called 911 out of concern for her two friends.

Joseph Coney could die... or worse... he could do anything but that....

Why did the boy have to ride the bus? Because both his parents died.

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a lightbulb? It varies. Alzheimer's is a very slow progressing disease, and many people suffering from it are capable of a wide variety of a number of everyday activities.

Why can't Hellen Keller have kids? Because she's dead, therefore does not possess the ability to bear children.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was involved in a homicide at the Children's Hospital resulting in death row right away and was involved in the killing of 12 other numbers on last Tuesday.

What is a black guys favourite thing to eat? Food.

How do you leave a jackass in suspense? I'll tell you later.

Paris Hilton spend 2 whole days in the slammer due to possesion of narcotics. I would have gotten 20 to life... no... it's not funny...

two mormons missionaries knock on a door they are welcomed into the home and treated with kindness later the family is baptized. the mormons return home with a sense of accomplishment and purpose.

What does the black guy look for when he goes shopping? Some soap for his dead cat in the living room.

an orange and an apple are both in a fruit bowl, the apple says nothing as its an apple and apple's cant speak its just an apple

A man walks into a bar and is slowly tearing his life apart. maybe because he is drinking poisonous acid instead of beer

What isyellow and can't swim? a bulldozer

There's an Irishman, a homo-sexual, and a Jew standing at a bar. What a fine example of an integrated community!

Roses are Red Violets are blue I have short term memory loss Hey look thats my bike over there.

What do you say to a black man in the morning? Good morning

What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? They both have handlebars, except for the duck!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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