Q: What's worse then 10 babies nailed to a tree? A: 1 baby nailed to 10 trees

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What the flower say to the bird. Nothing

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Yo momma so old that she has started to look into an affordable life insurance plan to ensure all her final expenses are taken care of.

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Hey, what do you call an absent-minded person? I'm sorry what did you say?

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Roses are Red Violets are blue Shut up I'm watching Re-runs of FRIENDS.

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Why were Billy's parents laughing at him? Because he was just diagnosed with cancer!

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Dollar ice tea... I drink that Supa hot fire... i spit that Two and a half men................... I watch that

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What do you get when you reverse Zelda's Lullaby ? Skyward Sword's theme.

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Haikus are easy. But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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djkldfnblfnbofgb

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Can Anti-Jokes censor curse-word tenses? Fuck Fucking Fucked Fucks

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I haven't read and I don't agree to the Terms of Service

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What do you call a black person who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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Whats long, green and falls out of trees? A canoe. Why did the old man fall out of the tree? He was in the canoe.

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Q How is it Going Patty? A:Hi Patrick hows it going?

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What did Santa Claus get for Christmas? Santa isn't real.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a smoke dectecter, You died in a fire

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Roses are green. Violets are purple. Charlie Sheen. Looks a turtle.

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There are 2 cannibals eating a guy well one starts at the head and the other one starts at the feet the one at the head says to the other on how you doing down there and he said ohhh having a ball you!!!!

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Its babies were being mauled by a cat.

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How to shrink China's population in a few minutes? Nuke them all, simple.

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What magical power enables Spongebob to talk? There is no magical power. he is a cartoon therefore making him be able to anything in anyone's wild dreams.

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What did one butthole say to the other butthole? I'm actually not sure. I wasn't there when he said it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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