Roses are red, violets are blue, your face belong in the zoo, don't worry I get there too, not in the cage, just visiting you :)

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Who has two thumbs and lost them? Me but I can't really point at myself due to the lack of thumbs.

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why did the 42 inch plasma screen blow-up 6 hours before the england match ? because it knows .

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one day a bear was eating for winter he ate about half what he had to and said "Im tired ill take a nap and eat the rest later. one month later he died of starvation

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The feds ruined the first underground, so in order for this to not happen you joined them?

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An englishman, an irishman amd a scotsman were walking down the street. What a fine example of unionism

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Q:why is steven balmont gonna beat up mr fatty goral A:because hes a fat czech Shout out to my mandem lewis hall&moses

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what has 911 got in commen with most bank robberies? all r inside jobs

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Why was the black man crying? Becasue his wife and children were killed in a horrific car accident on their way home from church.

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why did the baby cross the road? he was stapled to the chicken

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What is the best part about being a rapist? The orgasms.

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What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what you named it.

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Why'd the cop pull over the black person? He made a traffic infraction.

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It is wrong to strip a homeless man of his clothes and chew his face off. Note to self: Explain this to someone before they have taken bath salts.

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What is Hellen Keller's favorite movie? Around the block in 80 days.

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What does the blond say when she walks out of the salon Nothing, she is hit by a car, and promptly goes into a coma and hasnt said anything since

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin, your mother has AIDS.

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Nathaniel Nugnes walks into a bra

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I just sharpened this hatchet Don't make me use it!

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Teacher: What is 1+1? Student: 2 Teacher: Next time raise your hand before answering a question.

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Why did the boy let the falling brick hit him in the head? He had no legs, so he could not move

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Roses are red, violets are blue, take this medication, and call me if you have any symptoms of nausea or heartburn.

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What did the traffic light say to the car? Bye.

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Your momma so fat.... She's at risk of cardiovascular disease. You should take her to a nutritionist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops