How do you confuse a Mexican? Stand in the middle of a crosswalk while shouting "Cthulu will rise!" whilst looking at the sky and playing "Everybody Have Fun Tonight" by Wang Chung. Works every time.

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Q: A policeman is working past a room. The window is too high to see in. The person hears "no John, don't", and then a gunshot. He rushes inside and sees a dead body on the floor with a gun beside him. Also in the room are a doctor, a lawyer and a priest. Without asking any questions, he immediately arrests the priest. Why? A: Because the priest is the only male in the room.

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Why did Kallum come to Getaway? Because he ran out of hats

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At the Asthma hotline. Caller: Aahhh aahhh *gasp* *gasp* I need you... Woman: *slams phone* DAMN I WISH THESE PERVERTS WOULD STOP CALLING!

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What has eyes but can not see, and rolls everywhere it goes? A man who fought for your freedom and lost both his eyesight and legs in doing so. Have some respect.

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Why did the drunk driver get into an accident? It was a woman.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was running away from a Black family reunion.

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Why did the white policeman shoot all the black people in a house and not the white people Because the black guys were holding the white guys hostage

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Correct grammar and proper use of capitals on the internet. Oh yeah, and a horse walked into a bar. It didn't think much of it.

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You haven't happened to see a cigarette truck around here have you? What's a truck?

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Nathaniel Nugnes walks into a bra

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Naw, not now, I don't want to be assimilated, I am a bit of a wuss right now, really tired.

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what do hookers and bungee jumping have in common? They are both 100$ to be in/on and if the rubber breaks your screwed

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Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you. I slipped you a roofie, get ready for me.

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what's inflation? a hollow cost.

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When life gives you lemons, Commit felonies

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whats the difrence between santa clause and a jew santa goes down the chimney

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What Sound does a baby make in a blender? I don't know I'm to busy masturbating to it

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haha women's rights.....what a joke.

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Teacher: What is 1+1? Student: 2 Teacher: Next time raise your hand before answering a question.

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What's the hardest part about blending a baby? My D**K

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Two men walk into a bar. An hour later another man sees them knocked out on the ground. Q: What Happened A: They walked into a BAR.

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How do you know when it is a Mexican's birthday? They are walking around with "happy birthday" balloons.

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How many apples does it take to keep the doctor away? 1 if you throw it hard enough! haha

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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