Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. ( to heaven )

Why did the tomato fall off the swing? Because tomatoes don't have arms.

What did hitler say to the jews? Die.

What is pink and stuffy? Pink stuff

A man drinks a java while using Java His java was hot, making him spill on his laptop Blue screen of death

An Aussie, American and Englishman were all drinking beer on a plane to Hawaii. All 3 of them were very excited for their vaction, which they all saved hard for and their breaks from work were well deserved.

What would Marylin Monroe be doing right now if she was alive? Clawing her way out of her coffin.

What is small, red all over and gets shorter by the second? A baby cutting its hair with a potato peeler

What does Michael have in common with NASA? Not a lot.

what do you call a cat that cant meow? Charlie Sheen.

What is the way to a man's heart? Through his stomach. With a knife. Then then go up a little.

Why can a black man beat a white man in basketball? They are generally better at basketball Why cant a black man beat a KKK member in basketball? He valued his life and didnt want to die

Why did the Asian student do well in school? Because he worked hard and studied everyday

A boy walked in on his mom and dad in their bedroom last night they were having a leisurely evening playing scrabble

Hey I just met you and this is crazy but here's my chew toy throw it maybe!

What happened when Mark's hair died? He got depressed that he was growing old and the signs of it were showing.

What did the boy in the wheelchair get for Christmas? A bicycle.

Who is fat, stupid and pretty dam ugly? (hint: look in mirror)

Want to hear a joke? ...you're straight.

What do you call a black man chasing after a macdonalds van? The fastest thing in the dessert.

Koolaid is red, Poweraid is blue, Gatorade is yellow, My urine is brown... looks like i have a bladder infection.

why was the woman crying? her son killed 5 people.

A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

What did Chuck Testa do when he saw she had died of a heart attack? He cried and gave her a proper funeral and burial.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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