A jumpercable walks in the bar the bartender says ill get you something but dont start anything.

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A man walks into a butchers and asks for a loaf of bread the butcher replies " no im a butcher" The man says " its ok my bikes outside"

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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Your mum is such a slut, I'd reccomend she seeks psychiatric help, as her deviant promiscuity is clearly a phsical manifestation of some deep rooted psychological disfunction. We all wish her well.

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A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

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Why didn't the 1 month old chicken cross the road? Because by that time it's already a Mcnugget.

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The boy said to the priest, may God be with you. The priest responded with, "And also IN you".

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Guess whats in my hand. Can you guess? A gun. Bam bam, you're dead. Haha

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Wooooah! Thats literally the sound I made, anyway, can you like type the entire story in one setting, I feel weird, did you just try to hypnotize me? Anyway, are you trying to, woah, I am like high now...

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There was 3 friends named Crap, Manners, and Shut up. They all had mental mothers.

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Two Jewish men are walking when they see a penny on the ground. They continue walking because pennies are not worth picking up in today's economy

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If life hands you melons. Your probably dyslectic.

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Did you hear the joke about the man and the serial killer? Neither did the man since he was stabbed repeatedly and thrown into the bottom of a lake.

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Cripples are lame.

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Q:what do you get when you get when you cross a dog and a human A: a human-dog hybrid with AIDS

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Q: How do you turn lights on and off? A: With a switch

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What's the difference between a pelican? 28, because elephants have 4 legs.

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What's worse than 6 dead babies in a trash can? More than 6.

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What's worse than dropping your loli-pop? The Holocaust

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A man walks into a bar. After recovering, he sues the bar for it's irregular glass doors.

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If life's a box of chocolates, I'm the dominant male.

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What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac over off a cliff? A Cadillac seats 5

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What is the weirdest way to get AIDS Having Sex

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Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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