Whats the difference between an apple and a chicken? Many, many things

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Lil Wayne

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I like my babies how I like my chips. Chopped up and in a bag.

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What's red and every where? A bloody soldier who just stepped on mine.

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Gay people: "Quit calling Justin Bieber gay, we don't want him either."

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What's green and hangs from trees? Leafs

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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Why was it cold in Florida on Monday? Because there was an irregular cold front moving through. The Monday part was just a coincidence.

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It's weird how two of the SAME jokes can get different ratings.

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What did the alcoholic tell his son? Don't do meth.

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Q: Why did the boy have blue balls? A: because the respectable girl with high self esteem refused to give him head.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Interrupter. Interrupter who? Interrupter Jones.

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If you are what you eat, then imagine a prostitute.

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Ask me if im a tree. Are you a tree? No

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Q: Whats the first thing you see when you wake up? A: I don't know.

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An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Unless your father is a doctor and you live with him.

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This one time at Concentration camp.... My friends all died cause they were chosem in the Selection

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Are you ready kids "Aye Aye Captain" I Can't hear you "AYE AYE CAPTAIN" Ohh... Who lives in a pineapple under the sea "Spongebob squarepants" Absorbant and yellow and porous is he "Spongebob Squarepants" If nautical nonsense be something you wish "Spongebob Squarepants" Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish "Spongebob Squarepants" READY Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!

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swag

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What do you call a black man driving a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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why did the black man fall down the stairs? he was blind, do to loss of vision from cancer

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What did the vibrator say to the condom? Watch, I'll get laid before you do!!!

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What did the toy cowboy say to the man? Nothing, toys can't talk.

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a black man and a Mexican are in the back seat of the car. whos driving the car? their best friend

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops