What do you say to a whore with two black guys? How much an hour?

a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

A monkfish walks into a bar... The world blew up

A priest, a rabbi, and a muslim cleric walk into a bar. In Syria. Dead children.

How did Allen Iverson compose one of the most well known interviews of all time? Practice.

What's worse than a papercut? why do you insist on asking me these questions?

Yo momma is so fat that she is in the guinness records

I'm not hungry, so when my mon offered me a pear I said to her "No thanks, I'm not hungry". 

Adam is gay tom is here that's nice

Want to hear what's totally out of this world? Not wasting a whole page of space for something that doesn't even vaguely resemble a joke. [L]

What did the blind man say to the mentally challenged man when he bumped into him? Watch where you're going, retard.

Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, and a Lepricon were driving 100 MPH towards a brick wall and crash into it. Who survived? No one, they all died due to the rate of velocity that the car was traveling at.

What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

Q: Whats white and fluffy? A: White fluff

Q: Why did the boy have a bloody nose? A: Because a serial killer split his head in half with an axe.

Why does the Pentagon have twice as many toilets built as is legally obliged? Racial segregation

Ask me if I'm on a horse. Are you on a horse? Yes, are you on a horse? No. Oh...

why is lady gaga so famous? because she has a penis.

whats funny about four dead horses in a park ? the horses are dead!

why was the tricycle lonely? the mom back over the kid in the driveway.

What did one dog say to the other dog? Bark.

whats long hard and full of seamen? a submarine.

What did the customer say to the waiter when he found a fly in his soup? Sorry to bother you on your break, but why didn't I get a fly in MY soup?

Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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