What came first, the chicken or the egg? Well, to tell you the truth, I think that the chick-fa-lea came first.

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Q) What did the farmer say who'd lost his tractor? A) Where's my tractor?

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Why did Mary fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there. Not Mary!!

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They don't call it Bangkok for nothing.

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Roses are red,I love the walking dead,but if they kill off Darrell ill watch glee instead

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Why did the car drink Slurpies? I don't know. Why? Doorknob. Carl was unsure on what his friend, Frank meant when he told his joke, but then again who IS sure? Frank is the only one who truly knows what happened that day on August 13th 2010 when his mother came over for a surprise visit to her son's house just as Frank was heading out the door about to get in his truck and buy groceries, unaware that his mother was standing outside and bending over to ring the door bell not to expect Frank opening the door with his quick and violent actions thus hitting his mother in the face as the door swung open. Frank hadn't known his mother was at his house nor even remembered him but there she was, past out bleeding to death on his front lawn. It was Frank's fault that day, when his mother past away and reason why Frank hides his anger through his jokes. If only he hadn't opened that door he tells himself every night. Now he's cursed himself with his odd humour of using doorknobs as punchlines to hide his grief of his loss. And with that, Carl replies; Ummm.... I don't get it.

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Why did the kid fall off is bike? He was hit by a bus.

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Most people like to drink beer, others do not.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Not Suzy!!

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How do you kill a priest? Shoot him in the forehead.

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Why was Katy Perry naked with your mom? Because they were having sex

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How many infants does it take to paint a house? Forty-Seven.

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Jo Brand no longer looks like a ball sack draped over a football.

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alex and clayton are having sex at school. at that point, their teacher walks in and tells clayton about the dangers of unprotected sex.

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A man walks into a bar…. he then looks around checking to make sure no one saw this abashing action. He sees no one did then plashing a big smile on hst face he begins to strut forward only to trip over an empty can of spray cheese. it is important to note that this spray cheese was low fat

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What's sad about this man who committed suicide? He forgot to return his rented DVDs.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

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A duck walks into a convient store and ask the cashier, "You got any bread?". The cashier immediatley responds, "No sorry, we don't sell bread." The next day the duck comes back and asks the same cashier, "You got any bread?" The cashier sighs and responds, "No, we still have no bread." After browsing for about three minutes the duck comes back and asks, "You have any bread?" The cashier, as pissed off as a beached whale, says, "NO! WE WILL NEVER GET ANY FRICKEN BREAD AND IF YOU ASK AGAIN I'LL NAIL YOUR BEAK TO THIS COUNTER!" The duck sways his head and looks to the ground, only to look right back at the cashier and ask, "You got any nails." The cashier says, "No." The duck comes back and says, "You got any bread?"

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whats an aids victims last wish not to have aids

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what is red with 2 legs? half a cat

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what would abraham lincoln do if he were alive today? scream and try to open his coffin.

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glasses, jacket, shirt They call me glasses, jacket, shirt man. I never leave the house...without my brodies. hehehe hahaha hohoho!

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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All dogs are mammals. All cats are mammals. Therefore, all dogs are cats.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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