what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Cancer what did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that long.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Hey I just met you And this is crazy But I have alzheimer's Hey I just met you Coopn8r

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what is worse than a hole in your sock? Getting raped

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did Robin say to Batman before they entered the Batmobile? "Batman, I'm a necropheliac."

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar. The rabbi survives.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A man walks into a bar he orders a drink

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How are elephants and plumbs the same? A: They are both purple, except for the elephant.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A Redhead, a Blonde, and a Brunette are all standing on top of a cliff in Ireland. They took a few pictures, and all in all it was a lovely vacation.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the Pakistani man cry when the Nigerian man was killed in a terrorist attack? They were lovers.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the chicken cross the road? Oh..wait...that's actually an anti-joke already...

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what do you do when a blond throws a grenade at you? run

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Two cows were in a feild, one said "moo" and the other said "i was going to say that!"

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What has three legs, one eye, and is green and fuzzy. I don't know. Me either.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I FEEL LIKE I'M RIDING ON A CLOUD actually it's physically impossible to ride on clouds because they are sparsely situated ice particles.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's the one thing America's got but the UK hasn't... School shootings

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's black, white and red all over? A race war

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Knock knock Who's there Why? Why who? Why so serious?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

how do you keep an idiot in suspense. I dont' know he still hasn't told me

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: what sport has a bunch of white guys sitting on a bench? A:the NBA

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How do you cheat your friend up Throw a BRIC at her face.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops