What's the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of babies? One's used for bowling and the other's just sad.

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Whats worse than getting a papercut on the side of your finger? Being shotgunned in the ass

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Hey i just met you and this is crazy but your adopted banana

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Why did tigger look in the toilet? Because he is being treated in a mental institution and eats his own fecal matter.

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Who's Juan? DIS ONE

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guess what my weiner dog did last night? pooped in my bed

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What's black and white and red all over? A penuin that got bit by a sea lion.

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Q: Why couldn't the man lick his ice cream? A: Because his body shut down due to the fact that a bullet went straight through his brain. This happened before he could even order his ice cream.

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What's clear and looks like water? Water.

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What type of pants do Mario and Luigi wear? Levi or Denim, I'm not sure why but probably because you can get a nice fitting pair for only a couple of bucks.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was heading to the funeral house to mourn his dead family.

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An man walks into a bar and then proceeds to purchase an alcoholic drink.

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It's not gay until eyes meet or tips touch.

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while in iraq i bought a brand new iphone from the black market...it was only $250....its was doing fantastic until i got a text...i herd a loud beeping noise and the it exploded in my pocket and now i no longer have a penis.

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Nebraska the farmland its the only place for me!! I love the corn and the corn loves me!! I live for the corn and the corn lives for me!!

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What did the black guy say to the drug dealer? "You should probably stop dealing drugs to people because it is illegal and you could be sent to prison for doing so."

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What's the difference between my dog and my wife? I respect my dog.

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Why did Jimmy lay down? Because he was tired

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What stinks of shit and has money. Smelly Mc Dee I lied about the money.

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What is a pirates favorite crime? Piracy, which is still a serious problem in today's society.

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A man walks up to his boss and asks "Do you want to hear a funny joke?". His boss replied,"Yes". Before the man could finish his joke, his boss had a heart attack and died instantly. The next day, when he's in his car with his wife, he asks "You want to hear a joke?", the wife replied "Sure,". before the man could finish his joke, a car hit them and the wife died but the man happened to survive. The next day, he sat on a bench mourning, his friend walked up to him and asked, "Why are you sad?". the man answered, "Every time I try and tell a joke someone dies!", his friend said, "That's not true, just tell me the joke." "Ok" "Two Pigeons walk into a-". Before he can finish his joke his friends is kidnapped and killed. Sadly, the man walks to a ledge, jumps off and commits suicide. The End

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What do you do if you walk in on your wife atempting to hang herself in the living room? Ask her to leave the living room, as it would be ironic.

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What is black and white and red all over? Interracial sex partners with smallpox.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops