How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? That's not funny.

My gifts to my gf included: A diamond ring, a sports car, a house in malibu, a new credit card, a private jet, but most importantly, a Refrigerator.

Q. Why did Jimmy fall off his bike? A. Because he had alzheimer's and couldn't remember how to ride a bike.

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A= Were both lawyers! What happens every sixty seconds in the us? A= a minute passes!

Why did the man cross the road? He was in a state of depression and chose to commit suicide.

Roses are red, You're a failed abortion, Happy Valentines Day. :D

Did you hear about the three black guys who got run over by a car? No? Neither did Ray Charles!

golf is so gay i mean look at what they name the different clubs 3 wood 4 wood 5 wood 6 wood just give it a beat and you got a catchy song

Robert Dupra getting a girlfriend.

Who has two thumbs and lost them? Me but I can't really point at myself due to the lack of thumbs.

Why didn't the lawyer submit the car accident he endured to his local courthouse? He was dying of internal brain damage from the shards of glass lodged in his brain from flying through the windshield.

What did Emmanuel Frimpong say to George Elokobi? you sir, are DENCH

What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? Pants.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says 'Why the long face?' The horse says 'My alcoholism is destroying my family.'

What is big white and will kill you if it falls out of a tree in winter A refrigerator

Whats black and blue and red all over? A housewife that was recently abused by her alcoholic wife. (from will c. and jack f.)

There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

What did the monkey say to the newlywed couple? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

Wat did the man say to the other man when they were alone. We dont know. They were alone.

your momma is so fat she eats a lot of things

What is green and smells like paint? Grass, it doesnt smell like paint, I lied.

Why was the man dress in a suit ? He had a job

how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

ah-ah. the proper response to an anti joke.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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