A platypus walks into a bar. Why is there a butter knife in my basement?

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Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

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what did the duck with roller skates say to the camel? how are the wife and kids?

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Wanna hear something irrational? Pi

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How many blondes does it take to screw a lightbulb? There's too little information to come up with a reasonable answer.

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The Dali Lama walks into a pizza parlor and asks the owner to make him one with everything. After 20 minutes or so the owner brings the Dali Lama a pizza with every available topping. After he finished eating the Dali Lama thanked the owner and left a nice tip.

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Why did the black man fall down the stairs? Because he was blind

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Three ethnic minorities walk into a bar, and each does something involving alcohol that confirms a negative stereotype about his subgroup.

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Knock Knock! Who is there? I am the milkman and I have your milk.

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What Did The Ocean Say To The Other Ocean? What? Nothing, They Just Waved. Oh. Did You Sea What I Did There? No. I'm Shore You Did.

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I know that a lot of people don't like morbid jokes, for it isn't everybody's cup of liquidized dead baby.

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My neighbours found out this morning that I'm a serial killer. Knock knock [L]

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Why did the Grizzly bear refrain from attacking the hiker? It didn't. The hiker was torn to shreds within minutes.

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guess what? bannanas

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Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.

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You know what pansies remind me of? What? A flower

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Is that a banana in your pocket, or do you just have an erection?

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Jerry: Why arent you talking to me Seth? Seth then explains using sign language that he was born mute and is offended that Jerry keeps forgetting. Then Jerry uses sign language to say" **** off i have alzheimers!"

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Wanna hear a joke? Zeke friends Wanna hear a better jokes? Zeke with his friends

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Whats green has 4 legs and would kill someone if it fell out of a tree??? A pool table.....

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What is worse than being paralyzed from the neck down Nothing

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There were two penguin's sitting in a bathtub. The first penguin says to the second penguin, "Hey, pass the soap." And the second penguin says, "What do i look like, an alarm clock?"

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How did the man break his arm raking leaves? He fell out of the tree.

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Women, "Did just pinch my ass!?" Man, "Yes." Women, "Oh, alright then."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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