Just checked my Tesco burgers in the fridge and they're still within the use by date.

Whats worse than the Holocaust? A second one

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was stressed & having alot of financial, mental and physical problems so he crossed the road in hope to kill himself. And he did he got ran over by a car, may his soul rest in peace.

How do you make a boy cry? Pour soup on his head.

(To the pretty girl at the bar) "Was your father a thief? Because I really would like to have sexual intercourse with you."

So, what happens when Germany attacks France? France proceeds to slaughter the attackers mercilessly, as it was during the Feudal Ages, a time when France was Europe's superpower.

What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

What do you do when you see a plumbers crack. Tell him he has another crack to fill

-I have an idea! Let's play twenty questions! -Alright! But i have to warn u I have piss running down my leg

did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

A man walks into a bar. Three hours later, ambulances arrived, because the man was knocked out. The man who saved was known as a hero, and was awarded a medal for his good deed.

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police, your entire family died in a car accident. ... ... The police, your entire family died in a car accident who?

When life hands you lemons you can't make lemonade, Sugar and Water are two other key ingredients that were not included with the lemons.

Q: Why couldn't Billy breathe? A: Because when the truck ran over him his lungs were crushed.

What do you get if you convict a white man of murder? A black man in prison.

Why is Stevie Wonder called Stevie Wonder? Wonder where I am.

What was the black woman doing in the kitchen? She was simply washing her hands after eating dinner.

Roses are red, violets are blue, i got a boner, from looking at you

how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

What did the muslim do at the airport? He bought a ticket to New York and proceeded to fly there to mourn his brother who was killed during the terrorist attacks on 9/11.

what happens when a retard hits an iceberg with a gigantic boat? 1517 people die.

Whats worse then sneezing on someone? sneeze on someone and find out

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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