Why did the pelican cross the road? The man did not reply because his mother recently died in a car accident while crossing the road. She also loved pelicans.

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what did the soup kitchen give people for christmas Meatloaf] -Fluzturnusturbusturcusterdustur

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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roses are blue viloets are red this poem doesnt make sense microwave

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What does a squirrel get when it rains? It gets wet.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? I'm a talking banana; what more do you want from me?

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Three men are walking, the first one walks into a bar. He has a couple of drinks because he is depressed. He drives home, drunk, and dies in a car accident. His wife finds out and hangs herself.

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Repeat after me... I'matote ulbu twad Now say that all together Im a total butt wad

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Q: What's worse than being stung by a bee A: The Rwandan Genocide

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Q:What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A:Lick-a-lotta-pus

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I have two coins in my hand that add up to 30 cents, and one of them is not a nickel. I accidentally dropped them.

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Why couldn't the pirate go to the movies? He had scheduling conflicts

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A girl asks a Croatian bartender for a beer, the bartender replies, 'There is no beer in this bar.'

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"Horse walks into a bar. Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from. So, you should probably leave."

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Q: What's the difference between a child dressing as a ghost for Halloween and a real ghost? A: About a tablespoon of arsenic.

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What happened at the 21 year old's birthday? She tried alcohol for the first time. She partied. She danced, She's dead. Open case.

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What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino? Elephino. It just isn't relephant.

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One man asked another man what his favorite sport was. The man replied: " My favorite sport is golf." "Golf requires no physical strength, therefore I do not count it as a sport." Said the man who asked the question.

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Why can't Anne Frank write a sequel? Because she's dead.

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What is a pirates favorite crime? Piracy, which is still a serious problem in today's society.

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A muslim paints Mohammed

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Let's play twenty questions. Alright, but I have to warn u I have piss running down my leg

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Roses are red Violets are blue There's suppose to be a fourth line.

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What did one door say to the other door? - Nothing, doors can't talk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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