What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? Pants.

What gets wetter as it dries? Sarah Jessica Parker

whats the difference between harry potter and a jew? harry potter can escape the chamber

knock knock whos there? dave dave who ? dave starts to cry because his grandmothers oldtimers has restricted her from remembering her grandson dave.

How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

Q: A man walked into a bar and said, "Ouch!" Why? A: The man walked into a METAL bar.

Son come here OK daddy Daddy what are you doing DADDY NO! DADDY NO!

Why did the bakery run out of the business? They weren't making enough dough

Forward this anti-joke to at least 15 people And absolutely nothing extraordinary will happen in the next 10 minutes.

OMG, I have a really funny alzheimer's joke. Your'e gonna love it! Uhh, I umm kinda forgot what it was now.

why was the boy crying? cause an elephant tusked him up the ass

A fake pizza delivery guy goes to a party and tries to deliver DiGornios pizza in another companys pizza box. The party host calls the police and the guy gets charged for stealing another companys uniform and impersonating a pizza palace worker. He had to return the uniform.

What's green, has 4 legs and can kill you if lands on your head? a pool table.

How did the failing slut get an A -she studied really hard

what did the apple say to the orange? nothing, stupid, apples can't talk

What has straight black lines and is square? A refferee.

So a baby seal walks into a club.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says 'Why the long face?' The horse says 'My alcoholism is destroying my family.'

What did the Jew say to the black guy? Hey whatsup?

Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

What kind of pizzas did they last order at the World Trade Center? Pepperoni

There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

today in aa we were telling stories one of them was: that a girl put a wet cat (to dry it) in the oven

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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