So three men walk into a bar and buy a round of drinks for everyone. As they do this, three kenyans die of dehydration while their families weep at their feet.

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ill take a bullet for you... on call of duty... nahhh that ruins my kd

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it got out of its cage, was running away from its owner, and crossing a busy street seemed like the most effective way to gain freedom.

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a gay guy is in a club, from across the room he sees another attractive man with now shirt and he gets an erection.

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I was walking down the street next thing I new 15 blacks and Hispanics died in a dive buy. The next day every white guy in the cars doin the drive buy blew up ohwell

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John had 50 candy bars and he ate 45 what does he have...... Diabeaties

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What did the judge say to the criminal? I sentence you to a life time of solitary confinement.

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What do you call a seedless pumpkin? A pumpkin.

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Ed Milliband knows what's best for the UK.

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What is funnier then 25 9/11

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it was in the oven because the farmer was cooking it for dinner.

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so a moose walks into a super market and asked the lady where can I find the potatoes the lady says isle five so the moose goes to isle five and there aint no potatoes.

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Why was Billy lat to school? He was being raped.

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3 Men walk into a bar, they all order up a drink. And then they paid their tabs and left.

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Q: A giraffe fell in a hole and died. Which was taller the Lion or Giraffe? A: The Giraffe was before it died

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How to shrink China's population in a few minutes? Nuke them all, simple.

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What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

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Whats funny about a man in a pink leotard ? Nothing infact i think he's very brave

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What's worse than 9/11? FaZe Banks' upload times

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Why did the pelican cross the road? The man did not reply because his mother recently died in a car accident while crossing the road. She also loved pelicans.

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A muslim walks onto a plane. He goes to 13C as that is his seat designated on his ticket.

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Why did the catholic preist take all the little boys out in the woods? They were going on a camping trip.

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what's white and 10 inches? nothing....

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A man is driving down the road and breaks down near a monastery. He goes to the monastery, knocks on the door, and says, “My car broke down. Do you think I could stay the night?” The monks graciously accept him, feed him dinner, even fix his car. As the man tries to fall asleep, he hears a strange sound. The next morning, he asks the monks what the sound was, but they say, “We can’t tell you. You’re not a monk.” The man is disappointed but thanks them anyway and goes about his merry way. Some years later, the same man breaks down in front of the same monastery. The monks accept him, feed him, even fix his car. That night, he hears the same strange noise that he had heard years earlier. The next morning, he asks what it is, but the monks reply, “We can’t tell you. You’re not a monk.” The man says, “All right, all right. I’m *dying* to know. If the only way I can find out what that sound was is to become a monk, how do I become a monk?” The monks reply, “You must travel the earth and tell us how many blades of grass there are and the exact number of sand pebbles. When you find these numbers, you will become a monk.” The man sets about his task. Forty-five years later, he returns and knocks on the door of the monastery. He says, “I have traveled the earth and have found what you have asked for. There are 145,236,284,232 blades of grass and 231,281,219,999,129,382 sand pebbles on the earth.” The monks reply, “Congratulations. You are now a monk. We shall now show you the way to the sound.” The monks lead the man to a wooden door, where the head monk says, “The sound is right behind that door.” The man reaches for the knob, but the door is locked. He says, “Real funny. May I have the key?” The monks give him the key, and he opens the door. Behind the wooden door is another door made of stone. The man demands the key to the stone door. The monks give him the key, and he opens it, only to find a door made of ruby. He demands another key from the monks, who provide it. Behind that door is another door, this one made of sapphire. So it went until the man had gone through doors of emerald, silver, topaz, and amethyst. Finally, the monks say, “This is the last key to the last door.” The man is relieved to no end. He unlocks the door, turns the knob, and behind that door he is amazed to find the source of that strange sound. But I can’t tell you what it is because you’re not a monk...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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