One day, Jimmy didn't wake up.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead! Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was attatched to the monkey! Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? .....................peer pressure

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Why do people make fun of Laquesha? Because she's white.

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What did the mom tell her son who she caught masticating loudly? "Do it with your mouth closed!"

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What did the Jew say to the black guy? Hey whatsup?

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Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

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why was the boy mad? He had a lot of homework that evening

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What's worse than falling off a horse? Falling off a cliff.

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did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Potassium? K.

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A hasidic Rabbi and a member of Hezbollah enter a bar in a Jewish settlement. (No, of course they didn't.)

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he wanted to!

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You know what turns me on ....? TABLES!! You know what turns me on even more...? TABLES WITH CHAIRS!!!

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it.

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hey its jerry hey its dj want to see my goat noooo

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What was little Sarah's last Words to johnny before he got hit by the bus??? Can i have your ice cream.

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why did Sarah fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? not sarah

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Burp

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, a car ran him over.

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What did the man screem before he crashed his car? i dont know, he died.

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What did Santa say when he came to drop off your toys? Nothing. Santa doesn't exist.

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A man came home one day, drunk and feeling horny. He proceeded to the bedroom where he found his wife just getting into bed in a lace bra and sexy underwear. This turned him on even more so he cuddled up to her and whispered seductivly in her ear before kissing her neck. His wife was not in the mood for sex so she shot him

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Why isn't the dog a rebublican? Because it's a dog.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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