Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot.. You racist bastard.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you do to Jewish people? You Challah at them.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did Billy Mays eat for breakfast? nothing, he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q:why did jimmy fall of a swing? A:Because someone threw a fridge at him

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Hey guess whats funny? Matthew Mcconaughey Oh wait, never mind

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to change the bulb, one to suck my dick!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Before Marriage: Boy: Ah at last. I can hardly wait. Girl: Do you want me to leave? Boy: No don't even think about it. Girl: Do you love me? Boy: Of Course. Always have and always will. Girl: Have you ever cheated on me? Boy: Never. Why are you even asking? Girl: Will you kiss me? Boy: Every chance I get. Girl: Will you hit me? Boy: Hell no. Are you crazy? Girl: Can I trust you? Boy: Yes. Girl: Darling! After Marriage: (Read from bottom to top)

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why don't you want to shout "Hi" to your friend Jack on an airplane? Because he's deaf and will not hear you.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

whats worse than ur granny dying? uhhh...actually theres nothing is worse

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Ask me about my wiener. How's your wiener? I don't have a wiener, I'm a woman.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Sigh, everybody in the world hates me :( Moral: Seven billion people? Realy?

thumb_up thumb_down -5

An elephant walks in a bar. The bartender and everyone rushed out as soon as they saw the elephant

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Who cured cancer? Not God. What do you think of the almighty now?

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? Three bee stings. Whats worse than three bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse then the holocaust? Four bee stings.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A boy and his dad are in bed and his dad is telling him a story. And the cow told the farmer to get out of the bar. Now, what did the farmer say? Holy shit a talking cow!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

If an ugly person got raped. What would that be called? Nothing. It is never gonna happen. Kelvin Yang.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Word Problem Q.John has 32 candy bars. He eats twenty eight of them. What does he have now? A. Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

http://www.google.com/imgres?q=harry+styles+funny&hl=en&safe=active&biw=1024&bih=398&gbv=2&tbm=isch&tbnid=lc8_fNCatYHOqM:&imgrefurl=http://www.vervegirl.com/harry-being-typical-harry/&docid=86Gw8eNJ73tOYM&imgurl=http://www.vervegirl.com/cms/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/harry-styles-300.jpg&w=300&h=400&ei=q4vHT9XwHYL48gSJoJzJDw&zoom=1

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A white man, a black man, and a brown man are all in an elevator. The white man laughs "this is like the start to a racist joke or something." The other two men strangle him because he is white.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Gustavo Andrade

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's the difference between dead babies and the holocaust? A lot.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

I met a muslim girl the other day Shes the bomb

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the tree say to the plant. Nothing tree's cant talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops