How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

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9/11 my birthday

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I was not scared, I was disappointed, I was expecting to see you for you, not the whole strange outfit getup, what was the point of that? I know the deal about hypnosis and stuff, did you know it is actually known as monoideoism? But I really cant figure for the life of me how it is physically possible to be under a deep state of trance and completely awake at the same time.

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This is not a joke, I'm just bored (or am I?)

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? "Get in the car Robin."

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Q: How do you make a baby float. A: Put it in a blender and add ice cream.

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Knock, Knock Whos there? Banana Banana Who? Banana i didn't say your moms dead.

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42

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Just use the peephole. I am.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor Wheres my tractor?

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Why did Schrödinger's Cat cross the road? It didn't

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Why did the old man throw the clock out the window? Because he didn't want to go to a store that could repair it, so then he thought that it was better off on his yard where it could compost.

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What's better than wining the para Olympics? Wining the Olympics.

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What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my Tractor?"

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Jim: Kevin, how old are you? Kevin cries because they are twins. His Brother was hit in the head with a bat yesterday and does not remember anything.

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Why did the mexican go back to mexico? He grew up there

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Why did the black man get fired? In this economy businesses are downsizing and outsourcing jobs for cheaper labor.

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A duck walks into a bar- nope, just chuck testa...

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Why did the monkey fall off? It had no more lives. Why did the second monkey fall off? I dunno. Why did the third monkey fall off? Since the second was unknown, the third does not exist. Why did the little girl died? It's pretty obvious.

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Yo momma so fat she has more chins than a Chinese phonebook. Chins in a phonebook? I don't get it.

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What do you call a fat computer? Adele :)

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how do you wake up a really old man? you dont, he's probably already dead.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i thought violets were violet. hmph.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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