A man found a magic lamp. He rubbed it and a genie emerged from the lamp. The genie asked what his new master's wishes were. The man wished for asthma.

Why didn't the Alzheimers patient put on her shoes? She didn't leave the elderly home that day, thus taking away the need to put on shoes.

why couldnt the boy get into the pirate movie? he was hit by a mexican telephone server.

Yo momma, she so fat, she needs to buy extra-large clothes.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" After hearing this common expression, the horse looks up at the bartender. With this look, the bartender realizes that he has been speaking to I'll Have Another. Aware his faux pas, the bartender apologizes and pours him a free drink. The free drink does little for I'll Have Another's crushed dreams.

My mother always said that jumping in piles of leaves was fun. That was before she died of pancreatic cancer.

why is 6 afraid of 7? i don't know, ask 6

Have you heard of the lawnmower joke? No neither have I

What came first the chicken or the egg? Neither, chickens have been extinct since 1987.

What's worse than watching the Hunger Games? Playing the Hunger Games

What do you call a fucking idiotic douchebag with ebola? An ebloa paitent

You know what's real bullshit? That stuff that comes out of a bull's ass.

How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

How do you find the richest person in Mexico? You get the census of income per citizen and see who is at the top.

why can't timmy tie his shoes? Because timmy's an earth-worm

What is up, the color blue and has a face? the sky. there is no face.

Three men walk into a bar they suffer permanent brain damage, and completely lose their basic cognitive abilities. They will never be able to speak to one another again.

Songs can be interpreted in many different ways you know: "Whenever, Wherever" - Prostitution "You raise me up" could be an advert for Viagra; And as for "love is in the air" - masturbating from a rooftop comes to mind. [L]

What's worse than a black guy? Two black guys....and a dead white man.

Why did the balck man sit at the back of the bus? Because all the other seats were taken.

What gets louder as it gets smaller? A man in a trash compactor.

Boy it's sure cold out today. Die

What did the day say to his son when he came out of the closet? Its alright

why did the irishman leave the bar he had to go to his sons birthday party

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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