Q: why do orphans always go hard? A: because the can never go home.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Whats black and hangs from trees? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

I feel like am motherf***ing stuck in this duck and it makes me wana quack like what the f**k is THAT!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you call a 5000 pound gorilla? Obese - gorillas should weigh around 400 pounds.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Knock, Knock Who's there? The IRS, we're taking your house. This is a vacation notice, please be out of the property in 30 days. Have a nice day.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Roses are red, yup.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the vibrator say to the condom? Watch, I'll get laid before you do!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

You can lead a fool to wisdom, but you can't make him think.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's black and white, and red all over? Old movies that have ketchup on them.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How do you get the icing in the middle of a cupcake? Cupcake raper...Duh

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Have you seen Helen Keller's new car? Neither has Stevie Wonder.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q. What did the chicken do when it lost its egg? A. It went to go look for it. Q. Why was the chicken scared of the duck? A. Because it was chicken Q.Why can't chickens fly? A. Because they don't want to Q.Why can't chickens swim? A. Because they don't want to Q. Whey do chickens cluck? A. Because they want to Q. Why did the chicken jump on top of a car? A. Because it knows how Q. Why doesn't a chicken have hands? A. Because it's not human Q. What did the chicken dream about? A. Chicken dreams Q. Why was the chicken lost? A. Because it wasn't found Q. Why wasn't the chicken afriad of the dog? A. Because the chicken was blind Q. Why doesn't the chicken know how to drive a car A. Because they don't need to

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the chicken cross the road? The bold and unpredictable female bird escaped under the horror of the fearful fence of which enclosed the innocent chickens. As she wandered towards the nearby city of magic and dreams she approached by a large, empty road. A mysterious, shining object in the distant caught her eye. As she slowly to a shivering step towards the intereging sparkle, she was ran over by a car. EPIC FAIL LOL!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Math: "If I have 5 bottles in one hand and 4 in the other, what do I have?" Answer: "An unreasonable amount of bottles to hold in two hands."

thumb_up thumb_down -6

There is a law in california that says that women are not allowed to drive with house coats.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How did Bush really get into the White House? The front door.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the white boy not make his high school basketball team? Because he was not as good as the other players.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's black and white and red all over? The Nazi Flag in WW II

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the korean say to the other korean. I don't know i dont speak korean.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the man say to his wife while having sex? I don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's bigger than a horse ? An elephant.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Ask me if I am a tree. "Are you a tree?" No.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How do you tell the difference between Lila and derrek ashmore? Oh wait they both have vaginas

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the nervous man jump out of a plane? He was sky diving.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops