So a pirate walks into a bar. He sits down, and orders a drink. After giving the pirate a drink, the bartender looks down and notices that there is a steering wheel on the pirate's penis. "Sir, are you aware that there is a steering wheel on your penis?" The bartender asked. "Arrrrrrr, it's driving me crazy!" The pirate replied. "Well you should probably get that checked out soon," said the bartender, "It looks very uncomfortable and could be dangerous to your health...not to mention your penis is out in the open." "Yes, you are probably right," the pirate agreed. He proceeded to get a ride from a friend to the nearest hospital, for drinking and driving can be dangerous, and steering wheels on penises are not safe.

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What's the difference between a woman with an IQ of 160, and a man who is mentally challenged? The woman wasnt premature and abused from an early age.

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Yo mammas so fat you know what, i think she might die!!

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whats short blonde and speaks spanish? my spanish teacher Mrs. Inman

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What do you call an attractive woman in a blender? A very rare occurrence.

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What is the difference between a fridge? I'm sorry, I have a severe mental disability and telling jokes is not... F'tang F'tang Zoop Pong Wii!

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What's funny about a black person, a Jew, and a mexican's graves being side by side? Nothing.

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This sentance contains three errers

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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What did one dead baby say to the other dead baby? Nothing, they are both dead.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is a woman.

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what smells like red paint, looks like red paint and is called red paint? A pear, i lied about everything i just said

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Why is Chuck Norris so frickin awesome? He just is cause he's chuck norris

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A Palestinian woman walks into a library. She is promptly stoned to death.

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Why did the Black guy work at KFC? To provide money for his struggling family.

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What 10 inches long and wont be getting sucked this valentines day? Whitney Houstons crack pipe

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, my dick is hard, and it's cumming for you.

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You know you're drunk when you've spend a significant amount of time consuming alcohol.

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A king's son's birthday was coming up and the king asked,"Son i'm the king. You can have anything you want." And the son said,"Oh i'll have some purple ping pong balls." For his birthday he got a rollar coster, a pizzaria, a new car, and of corse, some purple ping pong balls. The next year the king asked,"Son, i'm the king, you can have anything you want." and the son said,"Oh i'll have some purple ping pong balls." And for his birthday he got a manchin, an iphone, a water park, and of corse some purple ping pong balls. One day, the prince was driving in his car and was in a terrible car accadent. On his death bed, his father asked him one final question,"Son, why did you want all of those purple ping pong balls?" And the son answered,"Well, i wanted all of them because-" and then he died.

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what did the African baby get for his birthday?..... AIDS

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So there's this guy, and he's trying to screw in a lightbulb, right? Well, he did it. Hoorah. His wife was proud.

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yo mama is so fat she has more body mass than a skinny person

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Q: What's big, green, fuzzy, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A: A pool table.

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WNBA

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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