A dyslexic man walks into a bra drinks a bear and leafs .....

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Jack be nimble. Jack be quick. But Jack still couldn't out run that bullet.

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What did one Teacher say to the other teacher? Nothing. The first teacher has a horrible drinking habbit which is getting out of hand, He beats his wife and children each night after his drinks at the bar. His parents have stopped all contact and he found some divorce papers in his wifes draw, also saying she would be getting full costudy of the children. He has lost the majority of his friends and didnt want to loose another one, and kept his problems to himself.

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Q:why did jimmy fall of a swing? A:Because someone threw a fridge at him

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have alzheimers. Cheese on toast.

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What is worde then swallowing a slipper? Swallowing a granny to catch the slipper

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Q. Which famous celebrity has had the most children over the last 10 years? A. Michael Jackson

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What do you do to Jewish people? You Challah at them.

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Do you know whats funny to say to someone unless they're black. Your ma's in jail.

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why couldnt the little boy watch two and a half men? because charlie sheen left and the other guy had surgeery and now has 2 penises

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Why was the man arrested? He assaulted and raped an elderly woman at the local Walmart. He then proceeded to hijack the poor woman's Scooter and lead police on a 4 mile long car chase.

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what is the meaning of life? i dont know, but im fairly sure its not 42

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When life gives you lemons, refrigerate them so they don't go bad.

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A boy and his dad are in bed and his dad is telling him a story. And the cow told the farmer to get out of the bar. Now, what did the farmer say? Holy shit a talking cow!

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? Because she has no arms. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

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Why don't you want to shout "Hi" to your friend Jack on an airplane? Because he's deaf and will not hear you.

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Q: What is the first thing you do if you wake up and meet the entire justice league(!!!) Which tells you that you are the "chosen one" and that only you can save the world once your true powers awaken? A: Increase your schizo medication.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. Traffic was too backed-up so the chicken took a different route.

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what do u call a hairy cow? Harry

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A man walks into a bar and orders a pop because he was a designated driver

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Why did the mexican go back to mexico? He grew up there

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A little girl meets a homeless guy named Ian McDermott in downtown Atlanta She then screams stranger danger and a nearby policeman comes and arrests the man.

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What time is it? It depends in your location and time zone

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A black man, a white man and a Jewish man all live in the same apartment block. Which is most likely to be at work? None of them, it's Sunday. [L]

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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