Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

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roses are red, violets are blue, im a bad poet, text me. LMFAO

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What's big and white and wilbkill you if it falls from a tree? My dick.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares...he didn't make it anyways..

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how do you get a dog to stop barking? you hit it with a stick.

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2 * 2 * 2 * 3 * 2417

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Sometimes Jamie wishes he could be a different person. He wishes he didnt have to eat dick everynight but it was all to late. He had to take it down the throat but he enjoyed the tickle it gave him

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What did the gay man die of? Obesity.

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So there is the standard english class with groups of different people. You got the nerds, lads, violent ones etc. Now the kids are doing a standard pop quiz. The nerd is next to the violent kid. The violent kid asks the teacher if he can go to the toilet. Everyone is nervous as it was based from last year's work which they haven't studied for. He then stabs the nerd in the neck multiple times and finishes his test.

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Knock Knock! Who is there? Me. Let me in. Oh, okay, Come in.

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What did the cricket say to the fox? Cricket.

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What did one tree say to the other tree? Nothing, trees can't talk.

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What's better than wining the para Olympics? Wining the Olympics.

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If an ugly person got raped. What would that be called? Nothing. It is never gonna happen. Kelvin Yang.

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If you have three ice-cream cones, and you give away two, how many do you have left? Why would you give away your ice-cream? Eating it is the better option.

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What is worde then swallowing a slipper? Swallowing a granny to catch the slipper

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(Something terribly disturbing that people find funny)

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What did the tramp get for Christmas? Nothing because he's Jewish.

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1: Why did Suzie have no arms and no legs? 2: Why? 1: Knock Knock? 2: Who's there? 1: Not Suzie

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Knock knock Who's there? Cow Cow who? If you really think about it, it's really now

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What is the similarity between John W. Booth and Pee Wee Herman? They both got arrested for shooting someone in the back of the head in the theater.

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I don't drink. I'm not 21.

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What do you call man with no limbs or a head? Your neighbor.

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Ross.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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