Why did the teacher need sunglasses? Because she taught in a classroom with a very big window and the sun kept getting in her eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What did the black man say when he noticed his crack was missing? I guess they fixed the sidewalk while I was at work.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What's big and green and I gets stuck in your teeth will kill you? A tractor

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why don’t stores sell mouse-flavored cat food? It’s a matter of marketing; tuna, chicken and liver flavors sound much more palatable to the humans buying the pet food.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What is worse than catching someone trying to cheat by looking at your exam? Getting struck by lightning.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Relizing its a used tampon covered with blood.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Why couldn't the girl eat her pizza? She had no face.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Whats yello and cant swim A bus full of dead children in a lake

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What happened to the homeless man at midnight? He took a shit on the ground

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Godilla walks into a bar. There were no survivors.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

An anti-joke

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Yo moma so fat, it ain't even funny. Seriously. She is suffering real diabetes! Do you know how that feels? I though so...

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Hey I just meet you. And this is crazy, but im a Zombie. And you looks tasty!

thumb_up thumb_down -24

How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb none, because chickens do not have opposable thumbs,therefore prevents them from preforming such a remedial task.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Moon: The sun shines bright like a virgin. He must be high..

thumb_up thumb_down -26

This site is called anti-joke.com Because it is a donkey.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did Helen Keller cross the road? Hoefuwpugosihfioapfsoihosw[

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Several of our "name brothers" have been attacked threatened and questioned almost every night since when we last talked on the phone, it turns out that these people are not after me. But after you, they have no idea that I retired years ago, and while their information is limited, you got yourself someone that is selling information on the deep web intentionally, as far as we know he might be selling you out piece by piece, and as of this point, you might be in dire danger.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't know any better. It very recently was decapitated in order tofeed the farmers family.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Richard Nixon walks into a bar. Everyone is thrilled to meet a former President of the United States who returned from the grave.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Hello penis

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Knock Knock, Who's there? The Postman. But I wasn't expecting a parcel. Is it for 37? No, Sorry, its for 35.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

why did tyler detweiler walk across the street? he didnt he has ceribral palsey

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops