What do you get when you mix a polar bear and a dog? A dead dog.

A man walks into a bar. Splash.

You know why one side of the "v" formation of a flock of geese is longer don't you? Cause it has more geese in it.

Whats the difference between an apple and a chicken? Many, many things

How do you kill a Chinese hobo Shoot him

what did the philosopher say, when he considered the transient nature of life in relation to ones own personal and egocentric grasp upon circumstance and purpose? massive erection.

roses are blue violets are red... i have to use the bathroom

Yo momma so fat, when she sits on a rainbow nothing happens, as rainbows are merely rays of light refracted off of water particles in the air, apparent to humans only on a visible spectrum.

Yo momma so old that she has started to look into an affordable life insurance plan to ensure all her final expenses are taken care of.

I'm so punny.

Why didn't the little girl show up for school? Because she was dead.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to commit suicide through vehicular manslaughter and knew that the average human being would not be able to stop before it was too late.

What did the boy eat for lunch? - His mother.

Person 1: So now that were friends on facebook, you wanna hang out? Person 2: No I'd rather not.

"hey do you know the date" "58"

What did the man say to his wife while having sex? I don't know.

What did the Dad say when his daughter murdered everyone Tea you're grounded

How do you make Samuel L. Jackson cry? Trick question...Samuel L. Jackson don't cry. ever...

Roses are blue, Violets are red, Pansies are green, I think I'm colorblind

Two bars walk into a guy, and the bartender says, "You're telling the joke wrong, stupid!"

what do you get when you cross a jellyfish, a jar, and a brown crayon? i dont know, im not into genetics, and jars dont have genes.

There once was a girl with only one buttcheek. She couldn't go poop. She died.

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Stolen cheese

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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