Why was the boy sad? Because a freak accident killed his mum his dad his best friend and he lost both his legs and is unable to feed himself

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What is the difference between john madsen and a gay person. There isn't because john is gay

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a man walks into a bar and buys a drink

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Why did the squirrel fall out of a tree? It was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of a tree? It was cruelly stapled to the first one.

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:Knock Knock :Don't be stupid there's no door here.

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what happens when a dog and a cat have sex? They create a beautiful baby that ends up dieing from cancer.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she has no arms

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Person 1 - Did you know there is only evidents of killer whales killing in captivity Person 2 - tell that to my uncle Pete... He's deaf

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What is the best part about having sex with tweny-six year olds. There are twenty of them. ap~pac

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A guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender for some water. The bartender replies: "Sorry, we don't have any." The man responds: "Sorry, I'm drunk." He walks out.

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What do you call somebody who can't walk? Handicapped

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Whats brown and sticky? A stick.

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Why did the black man get lynched? Because he committed eight murders and six double homicides, and the judge wanted him dead...

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How do you kill a blonde woman? Shoot her in the head

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What did a lot of money say? I FEEL LIKE A MILLION BUCKS!!!!!

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Connor is homo

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What did the mother say to her son? I have Leukemia.

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what did the terrorist get for christmas? probably nothing because terrorists are steriotypically muslim, but i imagine if not it was a gift close to his heart

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Uh no, yogurt as in the bacteria that they add to milk in order to make the finished product yogurt. You see, while the effect is seen in twins (for example if one twin gets raped, the other gets a fucking sore ass) Sorry, I am still under trance here myself, you get out of it, I am gonna have some fun, go splash some water on your face. I mean people go like "woah that is impossible it only happens in rare cases and so on right?" Fun stuff: Yogurt, you can seal yogurt in a steel container miles away after separating its culture (basically having a colony living together and then moving them away from each other as in 30000 kilometers and sealing them in soundproof safe`s and whatnot. Feed one half of the yogurt, and the other one far far away begins munching into thin air, now keep the food close to the yogurt, and the bacteria will begin "begging for it" (as in when baby chicks notice the parent has arrived with food), and so will the culture of yogurt sealed in a safe 30000 miles away. Why? Living in similar states, brings a natural connection, we are attracted to similarities, and as far as the human knowledge of the LAW of attraction goes, distance is not a factor, look it up, or just believe me.

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Why didn't Tyron run from the police? He had no legs.

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**** *** *** ****** *** ** *** ***? ***** I bet you wish you could read that joke. It was **** hilarious.

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what's worse than falling and scraping your knee? living within a 10 mile radius of a Japanese nuclear reactor

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What is it... Michael J Fox has a small one, modonna doesnt have one, Arnold Shwatznegger has a long one, the pope doesn't use his, and bill clinton uses his a lot. A last name

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neil likes pube toast

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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